Long Day With Short People

2009-10-05T07:52:00.011-05:00

I've been away too long.

My conversations have been few.

But while I've been away

Each and every day

My heart is beating next to you.

But now I'm here at last

And I mean to stay...

Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings -- "Tell Me"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EB69Ij5X6AE

(Go check out the coolest group ever)

So I'm stuck at home with sick Short People...what to do? I've decided to take advantage and drag my inconsistent self back to the blogging world. I haven't been here since March? Really? Geez, what is wrong with me? I've been trying to figure out why, and...uh...I've got nothing. So I'm just going to try to do better. Hopefully I will succeed.

The Short People are thriving in our neighborhood, where 8 girls under the age of 9 overshadow our lone neighbor boy (poor, poor Benjamin!) with their Kool Kats Klub as they gather en masse in sunglasses, beads and the occasional tutu to ride bikes, scooters or skateboards and nag each other like the true girls they are. And my god are they driving all the parents crazy! I am seriously considering buying all of us referee shirts and whistles for afternoons and weekends, when we are all forced out of our homes for hours at a time to intervene in the "I had the trapeze first", "she won't share her hula hoop", "but they're MY skates" arguments. Yesterday actually ended in some fisticuffs. But my, do they all look lovely while they are acting like wild animals. They appear much more civilized here at India's 7th birthday party.

When not verging on juvenile delinquency the Short People are busy with school. Kate started kindergarten this year, and India is in second grade. The solo photo of Kate was taken on her very first field trip to the Graves Mountain Apple Orchard to pick apples. I chaperoned this trip, and had a great time. We made a fabulous apple crisp with our selections.

Both Short People are taking dance. India is continuing to enjoy ballet and Kate has found she is a tap/jazz kind of gal. The picture of India is from her spring ballet recital. Pardon the stage makeup, she doesn't go out of the house like that on a regular basis, I swear. Kate likes a little more funk and is a big fan of Sharon Jones, Stevie Wonder, and Deelite. Kate can sometimes be heard warbling another one of Sharon Jones' songs "I ain't nobody's baby, I ain't nobody's fool...better get yourself a new one". God forbid some boy ever try to mess with Katie in the future. She'll use some of those techniques she's learned in the neighborhood...

As long as the Short People don't pass their crud to me I will be spending this weekend at parts unknown for an early surprise birthday present. T. is sending me off somewhere with my mom and sister for what he is calling "Amy's Fun Weekend". Hopefully I will make it.

Time to sign off and break out the Lysol...

2009-03-18T09:22:00.000-05:00

When your sweet lilting laughter's

Like some fairy song,

And your eyes twinkle bright as can be;

You should laugh all the while

And all other times smile,

And now, smile a smile for me.

Chauncey Olcott and George Graff, Jr. -- "When Irish Eyes are Smiling"

Confession time: when I began LDWSP I made a deal to challenge myself by beginning each post with only the lyrics of songs I know. I had to make a slight exception for this one, because though I am well aware of the chorus (who has been to a bar on St. Patty's and isn't?) I was clueless about the rest of the lyrics. Not only did I have to look them up but I had to research the writers as well. I won't make a habit of it, but the only other Irish songs I know are all depressing. Besides, Kate has a lovely smile, doesn't she?

Now let me just say up front that I am not Irish. In fact, my family is decidedly Scottish. I come from the McKay clan on both maternal and paternal sides. Weird, I know. We aren't from West Virginia, I promise. This was generations ago (I hope...).

So is it sacrilege for me to celebrate St. Patrick's Day? Probably. But when your sister marries an Irish descendant, your nephew is named Rowen (with reddish hair, not less), and your daughter is born a few days before St. Pat's it's an easy theme. And a fun one.

I think Kate had a great time during her weekend-long birthday revelry. To help her feel better about being apart from her friends on her birthday I followed my friend Janice's perennial party advice and "threw money at the problem". I bought a variety of sparkly tattoos, fancy headgear, decorations, lots of Irish goodies, made an Irish cake and an Irish-themed game, and made reservations at our favorite Irish pub. The only glitch in the whole Irish extravaganza was a lack of green bagels; apparently they weren't making them until Sunday. Oh well. There was more than enough green to make up for it; if you look closely you can see that I am even sporting some green sparkly nail polish to match my tattoo.

To add to the excitement the Short People had a real, live baby doll to entertain. Even Kate, who was not too excited about a baby, and a boy baby at that, was entranced by Rowen. He is a cutie, isn't he? Their fascination led to a fervent desire to care for their own baby dolls, so our den was littered with babies, clothes, diapers, bottles and accessories for real and fake babies alike. Made me have a few brief (very brief) pangs to have another. Don't worry, Tracy, it won't last.

We celebrated Kate's birthday in Irish style, but we also honored a few other occasions. My parents had their 40th wedding anniversary in January, my father turned 60 in February, and Derek had a birthday earlier in the month so we were a partying group. Mom and Dad are going to the Angus Barn for a private meal for two cooked in front of them with one of their renowned chefs, and Derek got a pub tee and some good beer...what can I say, I told you he was Irish! Since my parents are enjoying a second childhood as music groupies we treated my father to tickets to see Delbert McClinton at the Birchmere. He is famous for guessing his gifts so Clare and I decided to fool him. His certificate was taped to a rock (to weight the present) and labeled "and roll". Rock and Roll...get it?

I don't know, do you think he is excited about his gift?

Thanks for a great weekend, everyone. We miss you already!

2009-03-12T06:36:00.003-05:00

What's new pussycat?

(Whoooaaaooh)

What's new pussycat?

(Whoooaaaooh)

Pussycat, pussycat I love you.

Yes, I do.
Tom Jones -- "What's New Pussycat?"

What's new is that you are FIVE today.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR

KITTY CAT KATE!

Kate was born loving cats. As a result of this affinity she changed her name at age 3. She informed us..."I not Tate (she couldn't pronounce her "k"s so she was "Tate", not Kate). I Titty Tat Tate!". From that day on her name has been Kitty Cat Kate. Too bad Tracy is allergic to cats or she would be getting a kitten for her birthday. Poor girl has to resign herself to the stuffed animal kind, of which she has a bevy.

When we moved, our friend Sally made a mix cd of classic 60s hits for us to listen to on our trip. By far Kate's favorite song is this annoying little Tom Jones number. She listens to it over and over and warbles along, especially on the "whoooaaah"s. Gee, thanks Sally! Haven't figured out how to pay you back yet, but I will think of something.

It is difficult to turn 5 when you don't have many friends in town to celebrate with. She has selected blueberry pancakes, saucheege (sausage) and scrambled eggs for her birthday dinner. She already received the aforementioned Dan Zanes tickets (see previous post), but will have a couple of other surprises to open as well.

Kate had another birthday celebration when Tracy's parents visited two weeks ago. They brought with them a new big girl bike! A wonderful gift, especially now that we have a normal, paved drive instead of crushed clamshells. She is enjoying zooming around with all the neighbor girls.

On Saturday all of my family is coming to party down for a big St. Patrick's Day themed birthday party. We're serving all green foods including a green cake, green ice cream, sandwiches on green bagels and green punch. We'll play a rousing game of "pin the gold on the pot at the end of the rainbow" and later we will head to an Irish pub for dinner. We also plan to celebrate my brother-in-law Derek's birthday, and since he is Irish it's a great pick.

Maybe Kate would agree to go with the St. Patrick's Day theme every year. Who can beat green beer?

House Party Time

2009-03-09T07:24:00.006-05:00

jump up

day is breaking

jump up

let's get shaking

i know you're lying down
jump up and we'll dance around...

jump up

clouds are passing

look up

the sky is laughing

i know we'll be laughing too

jump up i want to dance with you

Dan Zanes -- "Jump Up"

We here at Long Day With Short People are music snobs. When the Short People were born we vowed never to listen to the dreaded children's music, a genre we hate for it's sacchirine singing, cutesy sentiments and just plain bad musicianship. Anyone who has ever felt their eardrums bleed from listening to 25 rounds of Barney's "I love you...you love me..." or happened upon The Wiggles will understand.

When we had our first Short Person I didn't know any children's lullabies so our girls have grown up being soothed to The Beatles "In My Life" or this lovely Tom Petty song (can't remember the name...the Short People call it "Daddy's Song) as we tuck them in bed. I will never forget India's first Mommy and Me swim class where I was the only Mommy who did not know the words to "The Wheels on the Bus". Unfortunately, I know them now. My mother, sister and I prefer to make up our own irreverent lyrics to that one... but that's another blog.

A few years ago I was pleasantly surprised to discovered Dan Zanes and Friends. A former member of the 80s band the Del Fuegos, Dan Zanes plays "family music" which is code for "music that doesn't suck". His stuff is so good that once my parents heard a couple songs and asked us to burn a copy for them, not knowing it was a CD for children. The New York Times wrote that “Zanes' kids music works because it is not kids music; it’s just music - music that’s unsanitized, unpasteurized, that’s organic even.”

So when I learned that Dan Zanes was going to appear in concert the weekend before Kate's birthday we decided that would be a fun early birthday present. We weren't disappointed. I actually think it was one of the best concerts I have heard...okay, behind Pink Floyd, Neil Young and Dave Matthews Band, the Indigo Girls with Matthew Sweet, Jethro Tull, The Allman Bros, Old Crow Medicine Show...but I truly did enjoy myself.

What made the concert so cool (besides real musical talent that included a mandolin, upright bass, banjo, saxophone and trumpet) was the laid back, inclusive vibe. Everyone was encouraged to dance in front of the stage or in the aisles (Zanes told the audience "we can either have a concert, and that's cool, or we can have a DANCE PARTY!!!!"). You can imagine who made a bee-line and landed smack-dab in front of the stage. I hope I didn't dislocate any Short Person's arm pulling them down front...

During "Catch That Train" the band convinced almost the entire audience to form a train and dance through the concert hall, out into the lobby and back in again in a giant, happy circle. They had everyone singing along, and the songs were all very cool. "Wabash Cannonball", "Walkin' The Dog", a couple of gospel tunes and even some Spanish songs. For the last number the band unplugged all their instruments and continued to play and sing as they strolled the aisles and led the entire audience into the lobby where they serenaded a girl in a wheelchair, then led us all down the hall and into a courtyard where they posed for pictures and signed autographs.

I DID NOT HAVE MY CAMERA.

I WAS TICKED OFF.

But Kate did have a homemade musical instrument made from paper plates and popcorn that she shook so hard during the concert I was afraid we would pelt our neighbors with hard corn kernels. Dan Zanes signed it for Kate and wished her a happy birthday; what a great present! I'm going to have it framed along with her ticket.

But it would be even cooler to frame the autograph along with a picture of Dan Zanes and the Short People.

Maybe next time..

2009-03-06T13:49:00.012-05:00

This is the end

Beautiful friend

The Doors -- "The End"

The last few months have been sad ones. We had to say goodbye to the place we loved and find a new home. The Eastern Shore was a wonderful fit for us with gorgeous unspoiled water, open spaces and fabulous friends. It was the place where we found our beautiful home, and it was the place where are children were born. We lived there for over 10 years and planned on staying there forever.

But some things don't last forever, and we decided that Tracy's job needed to be one of them. The decision to move was made even more difficult by the fact that we had to keep it a secret, even from our closest friends, for almost a year. The Shore is a small, close-knit place and word travels FAST, so this huge elephant was in the room with us and we couldn't talk about it. Even in front of the Short People. Talk about a challenge! Try having a crisis and keeping it a secret even in your own home. Throw in all my health problems and the death of my beloved grandmother in October and you get one gal who just did not have much happy to discuss for the last few months. If you can't visualise my mood just ask Tracy; he'll do a fine imitation of Amy In A Snit.

So now we are in Culpeper Virginia, trading the sea for the mountains. We've been here for almost two months. Boxes are mostly unpacked, the snow is melting, and the shiny is rubbing off. In typical kid fashion the Short People are resilient and have adapted marvellously to all the changes. India loves her new school and Kate has enjoyed a brief reprieve from preschool to stay home every day with me until she starts kindergarten in the fall. India adores having her own room (can't say the same for Kate, especially when India says "I need some private time" and shuts that door) and they love being in a neighborhood. Some of the sweetest words a stressed-out mom can hear are "Can India and Kate come out to play?".

There are still some growing pains. Tracy is trying to find his way in a completely different hospital environment and is commuting 40 minutes one way. A blackberry and laptop were waiting on his desk day one, and I have never seen Tracy react with such disgust. I miss all my friends terribly. Wednesdays are days of mourning knowing that playgroup goes on without me. Honestly, though, I am enjoying a break from all of my volunteer work, and am taking the time to sit back and focus on family and health. We are renting until we can sell our house (in this market that may be a year from now), so there is no pressure to decorate, hang pictures or paint. After taking care of a large home built in 1835 with a lot of land, a new construction house with a garage, trash and recycling pickup and CLOSET SPACE is a treat. And we still have a decent yard for the Short People and the dogs, too.

The past four months haven't been all stress and mayhem; during my hiatus from blogging some wonderful things happened. My nephew, James Rowen Tyner, was born on December 14th. He is the cutest, best baby in the whole world and you'll be seeing a lot of him. We had several fabulous sendoffs, pictured here, so we could say goodbye in style. The Tooth Fairy has been a frequent flyer over our house, causing a few panicked trips to the bank for more golden dollars. India was asked to audition for the Richmond/Tidewater Ballet Nutcracker; she didn't make the cut because she was too small for the costume (she is tiny but mighty) but it was an honor to be asked. I turned 39, where I plan to remain until I die.

It's time to crawl back on the Long Day With Short People wagon. I hope you all haven't forgotten me. And I hope some of my Shore friends will join the ride. I miss you guys!

Oh, and do you know anyone who wants to buy a fabulous farm house on the Eastern Shore?

2008-09-08T16:41:00.008-05:00

Oh, my crazy baby

Try to hold on tight

Joan Osborne -- "Crazy Baby"

Our almost 200 year old home survived the storm on Saturday just fine, with just a few limbs down and several bushels of walnuts to pick up before we can mow. The house is as right as rain, as it has been for almost 200 years. A house built to withstand the ravages of time and weather.

I can't say as much for our mental health.

On a good day the Short People are what most people politely call "busy" or "energetic"; code words for "high energy" or even "pain in the ass". They do not, I repeat, do NOT like to be at home or have to entertain themselves for long periods. My girls like to be On The Move at all times. They wake up each morning, rub the sleep from their eyes and inquire "What are we going to do today?" and woe to the parent who answers "nothing".

As an aside, this makes living on the Eastern Shore very difficult during every season but summer, and all of those activities are OUTSIDE.

So being confined to the house without the ability to play outside, combined with the very real threat that the power might go out, was more than the Short People could bear. I had, as part of our Hurricane Preparation Kit, socked away some crafts and activities but we ripped through those faster than Hannah. We even painted a birdhouse, which they completely covered in paint in 2.8 seconds and then asked for the next activity. We also had a dance party, courtesy of A & N Electric, who managed to keep us in power (thank you!) the whole day. Can you say Cupid Shuffle? What can I say, the Short People apparently like a line dance.

We also enjoyed quite a bit of dress up, as you can see. Yes, that is a tiara Tracy is wearing in the first photo. Later India modeled her very creative "Ariel" look, replete with a red scarf for hair and a mermaid's tail hanging out of her p.j.s. I know, the p.j.s are both Valentine's and Christmas; what can I say, at least they match...sort of.

In short, we weathered the storm but ended up with a nice case of cabin fever. Hurricane season isn't over yet...time to go restock the arts and crafts.

And maybe a bottle of wine or two?

2008-09-05T05:26:00.000-05:00

I built this ship - it is my making

And furthermore my self control

I can't rely on anymore

I know why - I know why

Crazy on a ship of fools

Turn this boat around - back to my loving ground

Robert Plant -- "Ship of Fools"

Or perhaps I should I have started right off with "Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip...".

We decided to celebrate Labor Day with a group of our friends on Cedar Island, another of the Barrier Islands that line Virginia's Eastern Shore. Six families (13 children ranging from 12 to 2) were to meet at around 10:00 Monday to spend the day and cook lunch on the beach. We planned to push off around 3:00 so we could all return home for a leisurely evening of prepping for the first day of school on Tuesday.

Out of the six families, three of us have boats. This poses no problem; we can easily fit an extra 3-4 people in each boat. But...one of our boat-owning families experienced a boat casualty the day before so we were down to two. Okay, no worries, we regrouped and just ran an extra shuttle trip back and forth. Within an hour we had all 25 people safely relaxing on the beach. The children were playing and swimming, the adults were exploring ( one found THIS above... we are assuming it's a whale bone) and enjoying Mary's Famous Margaritas. It was FUN.

The most enjoyable part of the trip was what the kids dubbed the "Hubba Hubba Highway". The HHH consisted of entering the water in front of our boat (braver children jumped off the side of the boat), then letting the current,which runs parallel to the Island in this spot, carry them past three boats to a designated exit spot. Even some of us adults rode the HHH. It reminded me very much of childhood tubing trips in the mountains...floating down a lazily moving current.

So relaxing.

Finally it was time for some of us to head back. Our friend John (see "Worries to the Sea" part I) ferried one family and just DID NOT RETURN. None of the guys were worried (their theory was that John was on a beer run) but after excessive nagging the wives finally convinced Tracy to go in search of John. And boy did he find him.

John was sitting on the dock, literally covered from head to foot in black marsh mud. He found John's boat a good 300 yards away, stuck in the marsh. Apparently John's steering had gone out, causing the boat to go kamakaze and catapult John into the water. This is a very, very dangerous thing. The Shore is full of stories about people who have been thrown from their boat and either hit their heads and been knocked unconscious or been sucked into the propeller and cut to ribbons. John managed to surface and push the boat away from him and into the marsh, where the engine revved at full throttle, threatening to blow. John made his way through knee deep muck, cutting his feet on oyster shells, to cut off the engine before it exploded, and then walk through this mud back to the dock. So we are down to 5 families, 11 children, and one boat.

Tracy got John into his boat and then realized that OUR boat was not running properly. Now we are down to NO BOAT, lots of tired and cranky people (and that's just the parents) who want to go home and get ready for the first day of school tomorrow, and no way to get there. Thank goodness for cell phones; Tracy called us to tell us what was happening and we found rides with other boaters. Another lovely thing about the Eastern Shore...folks are amazingly friendly and accomodating.

Once we had recovered from our boating (mis)adventures, it was off to school for the Short People. India's first day of first grade was on Tuesday, and she ran to the car at pickup time yelling "First grade is AWESOME!!!". Let's hope they work on her vocabulary a bit, but we're thrilled that she is so happy. Kate's first day of pre-K was Thursday, and she was a little "nuwvus" but seemed to enjoy herself.

Each Short Person selected their own "first day" outfits but were not allowed to accessorize. We are experiencing an accessory ban here, mostly because they broke 5 bracelets in 4 days last week. Evidently some of this happened because they were playing "pets" and using stretchy beaded bracelets as "collars". They would tie a scarf "leash" to the "collar" and pull each other along, calling each other names like "Clarabelle" and "Fluffy". Yes, school couldn't come back around soon enough around here...we clearly ran out of fun things to do and were really reaching down into the depths of our imaginations. This leash and collar design looked waaaayy too S & M and also resulted in a multitude of brightly colored and very tiny beads scattered everywhere; the vaccum and I are still finding them. The accessory ban is for the best; if I let them they would arrive at school looking like Evana Trump.

Now we are battening down the hatches for the big storm. School was on a two hour delay this morning thanks to the weather; sometimes fog rolls in from across the bay before a big storm and this is what our yard looked like at 7:00. Time to go fill up the tub, pull out the batteries and charge the cell phones. Wish us luck!

WORRIES TO THE SEA PART II

2008-08-31T10:31:00.000-05:00

Hello old friend,

Its really good to see you once again.

Eric Clapton -- "Hello Old Friend"

Do people you've only known for 5 years count as old friends?

Perhaps it's just that the Arthurs feel like old friends, comfortable and easy. Always fun. As the old saying goes, they are who we would call if we needed bailing out of prison. Not that I think that's going to happen Mom and Dad(who don't want to think about such things) and Arthurs (who don't want to make that drive to Virginia), but if it were to happen, we know they would answer that call. Collect, even.

Now that they live half a country away we don't see the Arthurs as often as we would like, but Janice and I talk almost weekly and Pat still tries to make it to North Carolina for the annual Merlefest dude convention along with John from the previous post "Worries to the Sea I". Still, we miss them terribly, so when we had the chance to spend a week with them on Ocracoke, one of our favorite places, we were extatic.

Our house was AMAZING, as you can see from the beautiful photo of the back of the house taken from our boat and our fantastic view. We were able to dock our boat in the canal in the backyard; every day was spent on the beach and the fellas fished from the back patio every night. They caught around 10 species that included, besides the usual suspects, some sharks, some rays, some very nasty looking eels that even the crabs wouldn't touch, and a turtle.

The Short People and the Arthur boys are much more self-sufficient than when we did this two years ago, so we could relax without feeling that a child was on the verge of drowning at any moment. What a relief! We also needn't worry about a dealing with a fall down the stairs, a two year old with a dizzy spell, or someone coating their face and hair with vaseline when we weren't looking (yep, they all really happened on our first go 'round...I'm sure there were more calamities but time and the Margaritas have blocked them out).

Some things don't change. Of course, just like two years ago, Kate had us up at the Crack (Crap) Of Dawn every morning. That child has some kind of internal clock that I would like to reset but just can't. Maybe in 2010 she'll sleep until 7:30?

The highlight of our trip was taking the boat to a large sandbar near "Teach's Hole", the pirate Blackbeard's hangout where he guzzled rum and did whatever else pirates do - including burying treasure, or so the legend goes. Wouldn't you know it, but the kids found these mysterious "Xs" in the sand and when they dug, voila! Doubloons! And one for each child. What a coincidence. Someone alert the papers! Psssst...Pat was the one with the brilliant idea. I'd steal it if I were you.

The water on this bar was as clear as if we had landed in the tropics, and we saw skates, anemones, tons of huge hermit crabs, and great shells. The waves were so gentle; perfect for young children, and the sandbar was nearly empty. Heaven! Here is where I could have spent every day. I might still be there if they hadn't dragged me away. I cannot describe the unmarred beauty and clarity of this spot. The sandbars change every year, particularly after hurricanes, so who knows if I will ever see this sandbar again, but it lives on in my memory as the best day of our trip.

We also enjoyed the bounty of the ocean and I'm sorry that I don't have a photo to show off our fabulous feast. Or perhaps it's good you can't see what gluttons we were! We ate smoked bluefish, beer batter fried fresh catch (Pat's specialty), steamed blue crabs and clams, corn on the cob...you get the idea. It was better than I could possibly describe and all caught by us except for the clams (Pat found 2 so we had to cheat and buy some...we'll get lessons in clamming before our next trip).

The kids picked up playing as if they had just seen each other last week. It was amazing to see them together again; Joe and Gus were really the Short People's first friends. In fact the Short People liked each other SO much that Janice overheard Kate approach Joe and inquire "Joe, India wants to know if you like her". In typical guy fashion he had no clue what she was asking so he looked at her as if she were insane and replied "Uh, Yeah?". Kate then clarified (and here is where my concerns begin) "No, I mean, do you like , LIKE HER like her?"

WHAT?

I don't know what to be most disturbed about in that exchange...a) there were way too many uses of the word "like", b) that India and Kate understand a little more about boy/girl relationships than I think is proper for a 4 and 6 year old, or c) that India is using Kate as an emissary to do her dirty work. Sounds a little mafioso to me; next thing you know she'll have Kate bumping off her playground rivals. At least Joe had the good sense to be clueless like an almost 7 year old should be.

Boy/girl issues aside, clearly this was a fabulous vacation. And even if I couldn't find all the energy that I wanted, even if I was the first grown-up in bed every night, even if I didn't feel perfect every moment, the moments were wonderful. Thanks, Arthurs. We miss you!

2008-08-29T07:20:00.000-05:00

Blue is the color of night

When the red sun

Disappears from the sky

Raven feathers shiny and black

A touch of blue glistening down her back

Lucinda Williams -- "Blue"

The code word is BLUE in the Key and Tyner families. I am going to have a NEPHEW! Since our poor father was henpecked by 5 aunts and a sister then went on to have 2 daughters and 2 granddaughters ( god, even most of our pets were female), I think he is going to be terribly relieved to have some testosterone in the mix.

We won't speak about the Short People's reaction to this news; let's just say that they are wearing tiny black arm bands and draping the mirrors. "Boys are yucky", they say. We're encouraging this sentiment in the (lost) hope that they will continue to feel that way until they are at least in college.

Please stop over at the Sunday Night Buttermilk Waltz and say congrats. Please also suggest a middle name for this poor baby; so far all they have is James ____________ Tyner. I am voting for Irwin or Rowen (or maybe Elvis...Clare is due near his birthday), Kate is hoping for Max, India likes William and Tracy is rooting for Alexander. But come on, people, let's get creative! Be funky! Alopecia, Chris Robinson, Shaft...everything is on the table at this point. If we don't help Derek and Clare the child may officially be crowned James Blank Tyner.

SO happy for you both ( even the Short People), and can't wait to meet little what's his name!

2008-08-26T09:36:00.002-05:00

She was a big boned gal

From Southern Alberta

You just couldn't call her small

K. D. Lang -- "Big Boned Gal"

It is official...I have a diagnosis. I have acromegaly.

What the heck is that, you say? That's what we said, too, when the doctor first started used the term.

Remember Andre the Giant? Robert Wadlow from Ripley's World's Tallest Man? They had acromegaly. This difference is that they developed the disease when they were children, which caused their haywire hormones to tell their bodies to grow without ceasing.

In adults, folks with acromegaly don't get taller, they just get BIGGER. Fat and puffy, bigger hands and feet (here's why you haven't seen in photos of me in quite a while). The copious amounts of steriods I have taken in the last 2 years haven't helped, either, nor has my inability to exercise. Acromegaly also causes enlargement of some facial features, ribcage, other places. And not only is your exterior growing but your organs can continue to enlarge as well, putting great strain on you heart and other organs. There are a myriad other unpleasant symptoms too. In me, it seems to be causing all of the sinus swelling, fatigue and immune system problems that have mystified my ENT and every other doctor I have seen for the last 15 years.

Acromegaly is rare, effecting about 1 in 25,000. It can sometimes be fatal if gone unchecked, and there are some scary things I am more at risk for now. I may have to have pituitary surgery, or may just have to take a very expensive injection every month for the rest of my life. We don't know yet.

Sound pretty terrible, I know, but despite all the frightening aspects of acromegaly I have to admit Tracy and I are so relieved. We were starting to lose hope; we've seen so many specialists and had so many false hopes dashed. To just have a name is a gift in itself, and the thought of a treatment that may alleviate some of my symptoms just sounds too good to be true. Does anyone remember the episode of the Cosby Show when Theo was diagnosed with dyslexia? His whole family celebrated because at last they had an explanation for his poor school performance and it was something he could receive help for. This is precisely how we feel, as odd as that may be. We have hope; something we have been in short supply of lately. And we have a plan, which both of us need.

When I was young my parents had a great book called "Grave Humor". It was filled with true, and hilarious, epitaphs. One of my favorites was "I TOLD you I was sick". We often joked it was the perfect motto for the headstone of a neighborhood hypochondriac. Now, eating my words, I feel like calling several physicians and others who have been both unsupportive and disbelieving and screaming that epitaph into their non-listening ears. Particularly those of us who are women have almost universally experienced being put down and ignored in the doctor's office, and I have sure had more than my share of that. It's nice to have confirmation for what my family and I knew all along...there really IS something wrong.

Another thought that plagues me is how lucky I am to have the resources and education to advocate for myself. The doctor who diagnosed me called me "politely pesky" and stated frankly that was the motivator which kept him on track in helping me. I reminded him that if I weren't "politely pesky" I would have given up years ago when one doctor in particular told me that whatever was wrong with me was in my head. I have had to be my own best advocate, with my very supportive husband by my side. I often wonder about all those people struggling daily with major health concerns because they do not have the ability to constantly push, call, write, and cajole until they receive help. Don't get me on my soapbox about the state of health care in our country...that's a whole other post.

As I type I am waiting to hear about an appointment at UVa with a pituitary specialist; please keep your fingers crossed that we won't have to wait months to get in. The waiting is what kills me...those of you who know me well that patience is not one of my virtues!

If you are interested in hearing more about this crazy disorder this is a great website: http://www.emedicinehealth.com/acromegaly/article_em.htm#Acromegaly Overview.

WORRIES TO THE SEA I

2008-08-20T14:00:00.003-05:00

Sunset at the shoreline, we are laughing, breaking up,
Just like the waves
Are you feeling, feeling, feeling like I'm feeling
Like I'm floating, floating, up above that big blue ocean.
Sand beneath our feet, big blue sky above our heads,
No need to keep stressing from our everyday life on our minds
We have got to leave all that behind

I have worries to give to the sea...

The Avett Brothers -- " At the Beach"

Great minds think alike.

As Tracy and I spent Sunday evening on Metompkin Island with our friends John and Susan, watching the sun set, I was envisioning what a great post this would make. One of the most healing things for me is the ocean, and the above song perfectly expresses the happy lure of the sea. It has been a running theme song for our family this summer, even for the Short People who often request what they call "The Whistle Song" for it's infectious, you guessed it, whistling. Ironically, as we were leaving, John referenced "At the Beach" by quietly suggesting "okay, give your worries to the sea..." as we pushed off for home.

Metompkin Island is one of the series of Barrier Islands that line the seaside of the Eastern Shore. They are accessible only by boat, and are (besides our wonderful friends) hands down our favorite thing about living on the Eastern Shore of Virginia. Once you park yourself on one of these Islands you can easily be the only people there. While we could see several families at Cedar Island, the next island down, we were blissfully alone. During winter when cold, wet, fog-laden winds blow across the Shore from the Chesapeake Bay and there is nothing to do, we just close our eyes and wait for summer and THIS.

I sure did a lot of that waiting over the past winter. Once spring came and I could get back to the water I felt much better. I have been lucky enough to have 3 distinct experiences involving the sea that have all contributed to my rebound into the land of the living (and blogging) from that ugly place I spent most of the foul weather months. The other two will be covered in upcoming posts, but I just couldn't resist starting with this one since John apparently read my mind.

John and Susan are wonderful friends. Susan and I like many of the same things, were raised with some similar quirks particular to the South that we laugh about, and she is one of those people that is just easy to be with. She also struggles with some mysterious health maladies so we can often "get" each other when no one else does. John is one of Tracy's Merlefest buddies, has the most infectious laugh and is just one of the all-round nicest guys I know. Their daughters Ellie and Anne (my Goddaughter) are stairsteps to the Short People...Ellie 7, India 6, Anne 5 and Kate 4. They are perhaps my girls' closest friends, and you can see them hosting a dance party in our living room here. They are a fearsome foursome, for certain, and Susan and I joke that we are sometimes glad they don't attend the same school or woe to all their teachers! And us parents, too, when they all reach the teenage years at the same time.

But on this night we were able to have a rare moment sans Short People and just enjoy each other's adult company. We picked up a bucket of Tammy's and Johnny's chicken (Oh, you have never tasted fried chicken like this...there are always lines of people waiting for an order), grabbed some adult beverages and just sat. The fellas did a little fishing and returned with a couple of entertaining fish tales for us ("John caught a croaker that was THIS big!" and "Tracy hooked into a shark or something and it just took his line...he really needed some off shore tackle to land it") and Susan and I shelled and, believe it or not, did crossword puzzles (yeah, we're geeks) until it was too dark to see.

Then we remembered that the dock is unlit, so we took a quick boat ride to watch the amazing sunset and beat it back. I tried to take some photos of John and Susan's house from the water but it was just too dark by that point...wish I could show you. It is incredible and their view is perhaps the best on the Shore. You can see the gorgeous sunset here; this is John and Susan's view every night. We made it to the dock just in time; any later and we wouldn't have been able to see a thing. The greenhead flies could see just fine, though, and found me quite delicious as I held the boat line waiting for Tracy to back up the trailer. Susan ran with the DEET to save me from being carried off by the meanest bugs you've ever experienced...now that's what friends are for.

We all agreed that we should do this again (with kids this time... maybe...if we have to) before it gets too cold and dark too early. What a fantastic way to end a day. Thank you, ocean, and John and Susan, for your friendship. And for taking my worries.

2008-08-08T12:20:00.000-05:00

There are some things I used to be

Won't you find the will just to remind me

Kathleen Edwards - "Good Things"

I vanished for a while.

Mea culpa.

I think I have put off rejoining the blogging world because it has just been too hard to describe why I left in the first place. The short answer: I've been ill. The longer, and more accurate answer is that even when I had the energy to write I just didn't have anything pleasant to say.

Shortly after my last post (the red and green theme should give you a clue as to how long it's been) I was bedridden for a couple of weeks. India came to me crying and confessed to being very scared. When I asked her what she was scared of (expecting "the dark" or "the weird creaking in the hall") she said in a very small voice "I am afraid you are going to die". When a five year old says this to you, her eyes full of tears, it changes you, for sure. I felt like such a failure as a wife, mother, family member and friend. I felt like a burden. Each day seemed insurmountable and interminable. Couldn't do anything without feeling bone tired, couldn't exercise; even things that I used to enjoy required so much energy that they just weren't worth the trouble. I have surely been what I refer to as "little 'd' depressed" (as opposed to "big 'D' depressed", which is when you meet the clinical diagnostic criteria and could benefit from some good meds and a nice talk or two with myself or a colleague); stuck in a rut of feeling bad, feeling sorry for myself and my family, and not seeing any light at the end of the tunnel.

Finally, however, I think we may at least have found a tunnel...I'm too scared to look for a light at the end because I don't want to get my hopes up too much. There is a possible diagnosis on the table, and I am waiting for lab results as I write. These tests will tell my endocrinologist where I need to go next, and we are hopeful that I will get back to the old me again. The chorus to the "Good Things" is also very fitting:

Don't get down
Good things come
when you stop waiting around
Good things come
when you stop looking
Don't get down
You've just got to stop looking

Since I last wrote some pretty great things have happened, even if I've been tired through a lot of them.

1. My sister got married.

2. My sister got pregnant (go visit at the Sunday Night Buttermilk Waltz and say congrats).

3. My brother- and sister- in law had a baby boy, Landon.

4. Kate turned 4 and India turned 6.

5. Tracy has picked up the guitar and is hanging out with a bluegrass band on the odd Thursday night.

6. We had to buy two cars in two months (ugh).

7. We went to the Bahamas with our college friends to celebrate all the fellas' 40th birthdays. It was great fun!

8. We traveled to Ocracoke Island with our good friends the Arthurs, who we hadn't seen in 2 years, and had a blast.

9. India danced in the spring ballet, had a starring role in her Kindergarten graduation, and lost her first two teeth.

10. Kate learned to write her name and a few other words, actually made it through her preschool performance without crying, and played some mean t-ball.

And so much more. In other words, life has gone on. And I will too. Blog and all.

** Please check out Kathleen Edwards if you like a female cross between Tom Petty and Neil Young. She's one of our new faves! She can be heard at http://www.kathleenedwards.com/

2007-12-04T18:06:00.000-05:00

Cry baby cry

Make your mother sigh.

She's old enough to know better

So cry baby cry.

The Beatles -- "Cry Baby Cry"

Notice that this beautiful photo is one Short Person shy? That's because Kate was too busy crying a puddle onto Santa's rug to be bothered standing remotely near him for the camera.

Fear of Santa. There is no official label for this phobia, although I for one , as a child therapist, believe there should be. To that end, I have decided to use this post to officially declare my entent to create a new diagnostic catagory that effectively describes fear of Santa.

Hhhmmmm. What to call it? "CLAUStrophobia" would work (get it?) if that weren't already taken. If we were talking St. Nick we could refer to it as "Hagiophobia", which is a fear of saints/holy relics (more of a Catholic kind of phobia, Janice), but it just does not quite work for this situation. "Santaphobia" seems too obvious but is certainly the most memorable option (Who remembers the term "ophidiophobia" even though many folk have it...it is the fear of snakes). So let's just keep things simple and call it Santaphobia.

Here are my proposed diagnostic criteria. The child must possess at least 3 of the following symptoms:

1. Child demonstrates at least two of the following physical symptoms: increased heart rate, elevated blood pressure, sweating or flushing.

2. Child exhibits tearfulness when within a 100 yard radius of Santa.

3. Child hides face/refuses eye contact with Santa.

4. Child becomes quiet/withdrawn when a visit with Santa is discussed.

5. Symptoms increase in intensity or frequency as child's proximity to Santa increases.

Yep, Kate has a mean case of Santaphobia.

It brings me great comfort to know that Kate is not the only child with the above-listed syptoms. Exhibit A...this site: http://www.sun-sentinel.com/entertainment/sfl-scaredofsanta-ugc,0,2343680.ugcphotogallery. The Florida Sentinal has an entire collection of Christmas photos marred by the ugly face of Santaphobia.

Perhaps the worst documented case of Santaphobia I know of was treated by a friend of mine. A little girl was brought in to see my friend, Eleanor, by her parents after she witnessed Santa being thrown in the pokey. It seems that Santa had a little too much Captain Morgan's in his morning egg nog and impatiently flicked this sweet child on the head for some minor misbehavior. As the incident escalated Santa was led away in cuffs. The poor little girl went into a tailspin, breaking all decorations that depicted jolly ole St. Nick, and stating she "hated" Santa. Poor child was clearly suffering from a raging case of Santaphobia.

If this post helps just one family,then I know sharing our own painful experience has been worth it.

2007-11-30T21:53:00.000-05:00

Teach

Your children well.

CSNY - "Teach Your Children"

Today Kate and I made a trip to civilization (AKA Salisbury, MD) to do some Christmas shopping and spotted something a little like this in the parking lot:

Katie P. yelled in amazement, "Look at 'dat car!"

There was a brief pause, during which I anticipated a follow-up exclamation like "it's so pretty!" or "why, oh why can't we have 'dat?". Instead she shouted a vehement and emphatic...

"TACKY."

Then she warbled a little Katie song "TACKY, TACKY, TACK, TACK. TACKY TACKY TACKY TACK" as she skipped into the store.

As Clairee says in Steel Magnolias; "Your Momma raised you right!".

Yeah, I'm crunchy-granola, liberal and all that, but I have taste, too.

Later, exhausted by her brush with tastelessness, Kate napped in her brand new hat. We bought it today and she refused to remove it. It came in handy when, as she muttered in her drowsiness, "de sun bodderin' me".

Another Clairee quote comes to mind, "the only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize".

And criticize, I suppose, Clairee.

This post is for you, Yo Yo. It is essential to the survival of our species that we had down knowledge through the generations. Wanted you to know I am working hard at it.

2007-11-28T06:58:00.000-05:00

Night time flowers, evening roses

Bless this garden that never closes

Treat her gently, treat her kind

Tenderloin will last all night.

Blue Oyster Cult - "Tenderloin"

One of the many events that occurred during my blogging absence was my birthday. My present was a trip ATB (Across The Bay for you non-Shore people; going Across The Bay involves driving 1.5 hours, traveling across the Chesapeake Bay Bridge Tunnel, and forking over $12 for the pleasure of doing so. It's where Shore folk go for a little civilization.) to go out to dinner and listen to David Sedaris. David Sedaris is a humorist who is often featured on NPR or in the New Yorker, and is one of my favorite writers. We were accompanied by our friends Tom and Mary, fellow Sedaris fans and also vegetarians. What does that matter, you ask? The significance of their dietary preferences will become clear later.

We planned to eat at a great little restaurant in downtown Norfolk but it was full to capacity, so we strolled in search of a dining adventure. Indian? No, Tracy doesn't care for Indian. Oops, the tapas place is closed on Sundays. Mexican? No, we can get that on the Shore. What shall we eat?

Then, like a Beacon in the night, we spot a Brazilian restaurant. Why not? It wasn't crowded.The interior was attractive and welcoming. We were seated by a waitress of some Ukranian-type descent. As we waited for our menus we noticed an odd item on the table. It resembled a multicolored salt shaker painted red, yellow and green. Then we saw, in the distance, a waiter with a sword (I am not kidding) of meat.

As we muttered under our breath wondering what in the world we had gotten ourselves into, our waitress approached and asked in her heavily accented English if we had been to a Brazilian restaurant before. When we confessed our ignorance, she picked up the salt-shaker thingy and explained "If you vant to eat ze meat you turn to ze green. If you want to stop ze meat or take a break from meat, turn to ze red".

STOP ZE MEAT OR TAKE A BREAK FROM MEAT?

WHAT?

After she left there was some nervous laughter and glancing around in an attempt to learn from observation of other diners. We hemmed and hawed but finally decided to "turn to ze green". What the hell.

Within seconds a waiter magically appeared with the giant sword. He was closely followed by another, also armed with a sword of meat. They described the cuts and preparation of each. I looked across the table at the vegetarians, who's eyes were wide with horror and disbelief. Tracy and I, on the other hand, were eager to have some of the bacon-wrapped filet and spiced grilled chicken (both were some of the most deliciously prepared meats I have tasted, by the way). These swords were later followed by others that included pork and lamb as well as more beef and chicken fabulously cooked in a variety of ways.

The waiters seemed concerned about Tom and Mary. They were especially perplexed by Tom. Mary did eat a little chicken, but Tom steadfastly declined each offer of "you like ze meat?". I believe they began to take it as a personal challenge, perhaps making bets in the kitchen about who could ply this mysterious diner with the choicest cuts. No dice.

In addition to ze swords of meat, as we began to refer to them, they also had a fantastic buffet with lots of vegetarian options. Everything was delicious. It was clear that the staff took great pride in the quality of the food, evidenced by the owner/chef (an elderly foreign woman) following Tracy almost INTO the men's room to ask "Do you like ze meat? Are you pleased with ze meat?". Tracy assured her he was, then fled from her.

At some point we decided to "take a break from meat". It became exhausting having to converse with the men with swords as they hawked their wares and looked crestfallen when Tom politely declined, again. So we "turned to ze red" and feel delirious with power when the sword men immediately faded away.

Finally, too full to eat any more of "ze meat", we left and walked to the David Sedaris reading. He is side-splittingly funny and I laughed a lot, but I think we laughed almost as much about the oddball restaurant experience. I have since learned that this is SOP at a Brazilian place, and evidently they are suddenly the "in" thing. Who knew we were so cutting edge? I would highly recommend it.

Unless you are a vegetarian.

**Today's photos are clearly Halloween. In case you are wondering why Tracy's nether regions look a little, um, odd, he was "Testicles, Greek God of male sex organs".

2007-11-26T11:19:00.000-05:00

Mother, mother ocean,

I have heard you call.

Wanted to sail upon your waters

since I was three feet tall.

You've seen it all, you've seen it all

Watched the men who rode you

switch from sail to steam .

In your belly you can hold the treasures

few have ever seen.

Most of 'em dreams, most of 'em dreams.

Yes, I am a pirate, two hundred years too late

The cannons don't thunder,

theres nothin' to plunder

Im an over-forty victim of fate

Arriving too late, arriving too late.

Jimmy Buffet -- "A Pirate Looks at Forty"

HAPPY FORTIETH, MY TRACY!!!!!!!!!!!

I wasn't around for this photo on the left, but I have been fortunate enough to be around for the others in one capacity or another. And I have loved you during all of them. It's hard to believe that we have been together for half of your life, old man.

Now on to the next 40! You are armed with your boat and fishing supplies, cigars in the humidor, I Tunes and Napster, your guitar and your family. What else does a pirate need?

2007-11-25T07:46:00.000-05:00

It's better to burn out

Than it is to rust.

Neil Young "My My Hey Hey"

Well, at least Neil approves of my recent blogging lapse.

No, I did not have a post-surgical relapse. I've just been...living, I suppose. Busy. Busy doing, instead of just writing about life for a change.

Part of my lapse has been because of productive, active scheduling. I feel sooo much better and am spending most of my time catching up on all the numerous things I have let slide in the last year. But part of my absence has truly been a blog burn out. What do you do when you feel like you have nothing to entertain folks with? Are you REALLY interested in the new paint colors in my den? Okay, Clare and Janice, I know you are, but are the rest of you? Do you truly want to see photos of India's first field trip? Will you be entranced by candids from our annual Halloween party? My Hotel Hershey Spa trip with my mother and sister (there are some funny stories there, but perhaps they should remain between us and our chocolate martinis)? How about the various meetings, school pick ups and drop offs, schleps to ballet lessons, toilet scrubbings, etcetera?

Are you on the edge of your seat yet?

I think I've just been motivated in a different direction lately because of my vastly improved health. It's cliche to say you didn't realize how sick you were 'til you felt better, but by god it's so true. I have energy again! It feels great to cook healthy meals, visit with friends and family, exercise, watch a movie without falling asleep, and generally feel in control of my life for a change.

Of course, Short People life continues unabated. Kate, when informed we would see a friend of hers who moved over the summer, exclaimed "I have not seen Chwistopher in TWENTY YEAWS!". India repeatedly asks when she will develop either a loose tooth or breasts. Kate now exclaims that she is "just bad, bad ole Katie" when she screws up. India suddenly began to read during a five minute period two weeks ago, to the surprise of everyone especially herself. Kate has named a stuffed animal after a different color each day (purplish, yellowish, orangeish, reddish). India asked me what language her friends in New York speak. Yeah, they are still the Short People.

Now that I am back in the land of the bloggers I vow to post more. And I thank those of you who checked in to make sure I hadn't succumbed to a horrible, painful death. Forgive me if the Holidays intervene in my postings, but know I will be there when I can. And finally, know that I missed you!

In the meantime, enjoy these photos from out family beach trip during the first week of October. Over the next few blogs I will catch you up with the new den colors, India's first field trip and the Halloween party. The Hotel Hershey Spa photos will be conspicuously absent. I will not bore you with any photos of household chores, I promise!

2007-09-20T11:51:00.000-05:00

Some other spring

I'll try to love

Now I still cling

To faded blossoms

Fresh from worn

Left chrushed and torn

Like the love affair I mourn

Billie Holiday -- "Some Other Spring"

What an amazing vacation from reality I had! I sat in the sun, read 3.5 books, floated in the Springs, ate, drank, walked, and slept. For three days I did not wipe anyone's bottom, order anyone to "get OFF your sister!", empty a dishwasher, remind anyone other than Tracy to stop talking with their mouth full, and no one asked 27 times what's for dinner. Heaven!

A mini-vacation is heaven no matter where you go, but at The Homestead you can't help but relax. The grounds are gorgeous, the food amazing, the amenities are abundant. There is an indoor pool, an outdoor pool, a bowling alley, a theater, pool tables, chess, checkers, tennis courts, golf, fly fishing, falconry, a shooting range, fabulous food, afternoon tea, a spa...there's more but you get the idea. We would have needed to stay another week or two to squeeze everything in.

For me the most relaxing portion of the trip was floating in the Jefferson Pools. For those of you who are unfamiliar, there are several pockets of the US with hot springs, and many are located along the West Virginia/Virginia borders. The Jefferson Pools, named for Thomas Jefferson, their most famous proponent, are located in the town of Hot Springs and the county of Bath (creative, weren't they?). They were believed to have healing properties and Jefferson reportedly recommended soaking 3 times a day and then taking a litle drink, as well. Since the water is hot and stinky I just stuck with floating in it, thank you very much. I'm not sure that the building covering the springs had been renovated since ol' TJ himself was there, but that's just part of the charm. The water is bathwater warm, soft, green, and smells slightly of sulfur. Floating and listening to the water burble along was ultra relaxing.

My favorite portion of the trip, however, had nothing whatsoever to do with the surroundings. I was able to make this trip because my husband was attending the annual meeting of the Virginia Healthcare Association. I grew up in the long-term care industry, with my grandmother owning a nursing home and at various times every member of my family (myself included) was employed there. She worked as an administrator until she was 78, when she broke her hip at work and was forced to retire.

My grandmother was a member of the VHCA for most of her adult life, and there are still many members who remember her. As one of the first (if not THE first) women administrators of a nursing home, the first administrator to take a Medicaid patient, a strong lobbiest for patient rights and holder of numerous awards, she was a legend in the long-term care industry. At this meeting being introduced as Jessie Key's granddaughter brought a warm response from many, and there were at least two administrators present who owe their careers to my wonderful "Makey".

The award for Administrator of the Year is presented at this meeting, and I was lucky enough to be present to watch Patsy Hobson become the 2007 recipient. Patsy came to live with my grandmother, my father and my aunt when her mother was killed in an accident. Starting her senior year in high school she became a surrogate daughter to Makey, as well as an Administrator In Training. Today, my grandmother is 90 years old and is a patient in Patsy's facility. I cried as I watched Patsy accept this prestigious award and speak about my grandmother. I wish Makey were able to understand what has happened, and just how much everyone in this industry still loves and appreciates her.

I am home today with a sick Short Person, I've wiped bottoms, and I've emptied to dishwasher. Back to reality!

2007-09-14T13:42:00.000-05:00

I want to get away

I want to fly away

Yeah yeah yeah

Let's go and see the stars

The milky way

or even Mars

Where it could just be ours

Lenny Kravitz -- "Fly Away"

In a couple of days I will be THERE, right by the pool. With a book. Unless it is too cold, and then I'll be HERE:

or even here.

Most importantly, I know I won't be HERE

We are off to a meeting for Tracy at the Homestead in Hot Springs, VA, and I am just along for the ride. I'm going to sleep, relax, read, soak in the springs, and get some much needed R&R. See you when I get back!

2007-09-11T13:15:00.000-05:00

Sister cry, count the stars.

Is many in the sky that passed you by.

Could be up ahead you'll be seeing changes.

Jayhawks -- "Sister Cry"

Last Thursday was Katie Cat's turn to have her first day of preschool. She was very teary because it was her first time going to Belle Croft without India there to comfort her. Kate is a tentative soul and really relies on India for support, so going alone was a big step. There were lots of tears/whining/ pleading on the drive to school, and let's just say Kate rivaled G.I. Joe with the kung-fu grip as we approached the door. My goddaughter Anne, who is a year older, has been tapped to be a surrogate big sis for Kate and she was one of the first faces we saw as we walked in the door. There were also lots of other friends greeting her with smiles and hugs. Girls start the squealing and hugging very early, don't they?

The preschool Welcome Wagon helped quite a bit, but I still needed to pry Kate off my leg so I could go. I hate, hate, hate leaving the Short People when they are crying. I know the teachers just want Moms to get the hell out so the child will stop crying , but I always feel like a terrible parent carelessly abandoning my child when they need me most.

Thankfully, today was a bit smoother. And I am finding the free time so helpful. I was able to host a meeting for a Hospice fundraiser I am co chairing and am also getting some errands accomplished sans shrieking, begging, arguing or rushing to every public restroom on the Eastern Shore before someone has an accident (no, I don't mean me). There is one store that it never fails...someone has to go EVERY TIME we enter. It has become a joke with the store owner, who graciously opens her restroom to us.

While Kate can be timid and a bit grumpy, she never fails to crack me up. We ran into my friend Louise and we spoke to each other. Louise is from Tasmania and has an Australian-sounding accent that I adore. As we walked away, Kate asked "Who was dat?" I answered that it was Ms. Louise, and Kate replied "Oh, the lady who says 'haloo'!

2007-09-10T06:56:00.000-05:00

You ain't nothin' but a hound dog

cryin' all the time.

You ain't nothin' but a hound dog

cryin' all the time.

Well, you ain't never caught a rabbit

and you ain't no friend of mine.

When they said you was high classed,

well, that was just a lie.

Elvis Presley -- "Hound Dog"

Miss Fontella Bass, the youngest member of the Turmanator clan, has been conspicuously absent from recent posts. Several of you have asked me about her and let me just tell you that she is EVIL. And who wants to post about evil?

'Tella (or 'Tella Monster, as she is sometimes not so affectionately called) has outgrown her precious, cuddly baby stage is now a gangly, awkward teenage mutt. Normally by this point in our relationship she would have won us over with her winning personality and loyal disposition, no longer needing the sweet puppy face and wriggly body to ensure her survival in our household. But somehow 'Tella missed this evolutionary skill and is annoying the crap out of everyone in the family.

To illustrate: a typical stroll to the car has become a scene from "Apocalypse Now".

I open the bunker door and search the perimeter for signs of the enemy. I, as Squadron Leader, give the command to "Go to the car; move, move, move!" We race to the tank and jump in with 'Tella on our tails. She's emerged from nowhere, an expert in the ways of disguise and the sneak attack. She manages to fight her way into the car; once pristine uniforms are now soaking wet and streaked with mud. As leader of this troop I am entrusted with the difficult task of removing the enemy, which involves entering the back of the van, er, tank, and yanking her out by her collar. Once I have secured the vehicle we race away with 'Tella on our tails. More than once it had been necessary for me to exit the protective confines of our mobile unit and yell for the enemy to return to her camp and get out of the road. War is hell.

To avoid having to run the gauntlet each morning we have asked (begged) Tracy to take the dogs to their pen. This, too, is a strategically timed mission. First we must ensure they eat their food, which is no mean feat given that 'Tella spends more time guarding her food from Daisy Jane than she spends in consumption. After numerous reminders to "eat your food, 'Tella!" Tracy puts her on her leash (Daisy Jane obediently responds to "Go to your pen", but not the 'Tella Monster) and escorts her, becoming filthy and wet in the process. This means that he has to take the dogs out BEFORE he changes into his suit for work. Now the girls open the front door and tentatively ask "are the dogs in their pen?".

Affirmative. Over and out.

**We really do love the little Monster, as you can see from the photo of Kate. Perhaps she'll calm down in a year or so?

2007-09-04T10:31:00.000-05:00

So be true to your school now

Just like you would to your girl or guy.

Be true to your school now

And let your colors fly.

Be true to your school.

Beach Boys -- "Be True to your School"

India, the oldest Short Person, took off for kindergarten today. In typical Short People style, she was all decked out in a dress hand-selected by her for the occasion, with a matching hair band and a necklace tossed on at the last minute. India apparently shares the philosophical opinion of Olympia Dukakis' character in Steel Magnolias; "The only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize". Too bad she hasn't learned about MATCHING yet. Do they teach that in kindergarten?

After a few first day photos (one with "Frinkles", her favorite lovey, for security) all the family loaded in the car and took India into her classroom. On the way she informed us she had "a few butterflies in my tummy" but she bravely entered, clutching her sweaty hand in mine and biting her lip. As I hugged her goodbye she whispered "I don't want you to leave". Gulp! I knew we had to bolt before she started crying and latching on, so we ran out the door cheerily shouting for her to have a good day. I did peek through the window like a stalker to make sure she was not crying, and she wasn't. Can't wait to pick her up and hear about her day.

Clare and Derek

On another note I want to send congratulations to Derek and my sister Clare at The Sunday Night Buttermilk Waltz. They are engaged!!!!! We couldn't be happier to welcome Derek into this crazy family, and hope we haven't scared him too much. The Short People are also thrilled, and are mostly concerned with 1) will Auntie Clare wear a "brider" (aka "veil"), 2) will they get to wear dresses, and 3) will there be cake?

2007-08-29T15:40:00.000-05:00

Ramble on,
And now's the time, the time is now
To sing my song...
Led Zepplin -- "Ramble On"

I've been "tagged" by Deana at Friday Night Fish Fry, so it's time to stop writing about the Short People and focus on myself for a bit. Here goes:

1. You have to post these rules before you give the facts.

2. You must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.

3. At the end of your blog post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

BROOKE

B: Bold. I am a strong person who doesn't mind speaking out. I've held presidential or chair roles in several organizations and I think it's because I don't have a problem with being the bad guy when necessary (not to mention no one else ever wants the job...too bad there is no "S" in my name for "sucker"). I try to tone down the aspects of this part of my personality that can be unpleasant (bossy, another "B" word), and turn it into a strength. I hope I succeed most of the time.

R: Radical. A friend once described me as "unconventional". I don't know if she meant it to be flattering, but I sure took it as a compliment. Who wants to be like everyone else?

O: Open-minded. While I am not shy about sharing my opinions, I truly don't expect everyone to agree with them. I love to engage in good-natured discussions about politics, religion, or anything else. I have friends who range the entire continuum and I love that.

O: Organized. Not as much as some of my friends (this means you, Janice!) but I am a list queen and I can carry a lot of info in my head. Every once in a while I slip up, but I am usually prepared, on time, and neat. "Organized" does not equal "clean", however. I am a terrible housecleaner. On a positive note, even though a given item may be covered in dust I know exactly where to find it.

K: Keen. Keen often means razor-sharp. I can certainly be sarcastic and even cutting at times. But keen can also mean perceptive; I am highly attuned to others and their feelings/needs, which comes in handy being a therapist. Keen is also synonymous with clever. I don't know about clever, but my brain is almost always switched to the "on" postition ( drives poor Tracy crazy). I can't just sit and watch TV; I will do crossword puzzles or read at the same time. The only other definition of keen I can think of is to howl or wail...I don't do that one, promise!

E: Earthy. I love the outdoors, flowers, the beach, nature, animals...the whole shebang. My house is full of rocks, shells, driftwood, birdsnests, and anything else I find and can use to bring the outside in. If I could have the windows open every day I would do it in a minute. Exceptions: humidity, mosquitos and greenheads, and poison ivy.

Whew! That was a tough meme. Okay, now the tagging part. I will hit up Brooke at Joycekids because she has the same name, my sister Clare at the Sunday Night Buttermilk Waltz, who's first name is Katherine. I will also hit up my friend Janice who doesn't have a blog but will, for the sake of our friendship, play along in the comments even though I outed her organizational skills (you know I worship your abilities). Thank you, Deana, for the challenge!

2007-08-29T06:54:00.000-05:00

You say it's your birthday

It's my birthday too--yeah

They say it's your birthday

We're gonna have a good time

I'm glad it's your birthday

Happy birthday to you.

The Beatles -- Birthday

I want to ask everyone to visit my sister at The Sunday Night Buttermilk Waltz (see link above) and wish her a very Happy Birthday. I am working on two "tags" and will post them soon. I am hosting our playgroup tomorrow (imagine your house overrun with 20+ Short People and their mothers) and watching a friend's daughter at the same time. On Thursday I am watching another friend's daughter. Just a little preoccupied right now, but I will finish the tags, I promise.
Love you, Katie Clare!

2007-08-24T14:50:00.000-05:00

That low down man of mine

Mistreats me all the time

He sez he loves me only

Then turns around and

leaves me sad and lonely...

Squirrel Nut Zippers --

"Low Down Man"

Meet William, India's betrothed. Cute, isn't he? India has been insisting that she was going to marry William for half of her life. Okay, she's only 5 so half her life isn't really that long, but she's been consistent in her adoration. So what's the problem? India's got to step in line.

William is a hot commodity; he is also pursued by two other little harlots, ehem, I mean little girls. They have made their marital desires quite plain. Poor William. What's a man to do? The other two girls frequently fight and argue over him. Thank goodness India knows to step out of the fray...she is not a cat fighter. When the claws come out, William advises that he will not marry any female who fights and argues. Good boy.

Since William's mother and I are not fans of prostituting out our children when they are in preschool, we have tried to discourage this talk of marriage. I'm not even sure where it even comes from, since I don't talk to the Short People about boyfriends and the like. I'm blaming it on the Disney Princess marketing machine. Anyway, when I try to steer the conversation away from marriage India tacitly ignores me, but like any good son William has taken his mother's advice to heart. If India brings up the "M" word he sweetly answers her with "I will have to think about that".

Today William came for a play date and as I sat nearby I eavesdropped. I learned that dating is the same at any age. The conversation went like this:

India- "What's your favorite undersea animal?"

William -"Shark"

India "Mine is the turtle. I also like alligators, but they don't live under water. I also like..bla bla bla (this goes on for some time)...what's your next favorite?"

William - Falls out of his seat in a stupor, ears smoking.

I assume this is the equivalent of "what's your sign" or "what's your favorite color". Later the conversation progressed from the "Getting to Know You" stage to what I like to call "The Thrill Is Gone".

William - makes obscene gas sound effect

India - "WILLIAM! What do you say?"

William - "That was funny!"

India - "No, William. You say 'excuse me'!"

Hard to believe these two are 5 and 6. Perhaps India has just crossed to the front of the line. Sounds like they are already married to me!

2007-08-21T15:24:00.000-05:00

Don't push me

I can do it myself

Watch how high

I can swing myself

ha ha ha

Sugar Hill Gang --
"It's Like a Dream Sometimes"

What the hell is happening to the music scene? They Might Be Giants, Dan Zanes from the Del Fuegos, and now the Sugar Hill Gang have become children's musicians? I suppose they have all watched Laurie Berkner make a mint and are trying to revive their failing careers, but I never thought that one of the first rap groups would go from bustin' a rhyme to nursery rhymes. By the way, just in case you were wondering that is NOT the Sugar Hill Gang pictured on the left.

Unfortunately, I actually heard this terrible ditty. I pray I never do again. I am so grateful that the Short People listen to what Tracy and I like. I'n not sure they really understand that there are CDs and even whole radio stations filled with music just for kids, and I consider it my moral obligation as their mother to keep that information a secret for as long as possible. Right now Kate's favorite song is "Statesboro Blues", which India sings along to belting out "Wake up MAMMAL, turn your lamp down low". I couldn't be prouder. They also love Dee-Lite's "Groove Is In The Heart" and Paolo Nutini. I so much prefer these to "Bananaphone" ("Ring, ring ring, ring...." put that in just for you, Derek).

In an effort to further cultivate our children's ears for good music (i.e. stuff their parents can tolerate) we recently visited the 73rd Galax Fiddler's Convention. My parents, my sister and her boyfriend Derek, and some of my sister's friends (Hi Sue!) tagged along and we had a great time. Our hands-down favorite band was Special Ed and the Short Bus (also wins for best band name, with Pink Lloyd and the Wahl coming in second place). My father purchased Special Ed's CD and Derek fervently burned several copies for us all to enjoy on the ride home. I received a frantic call from my parents, who worried that we had tried out the CD in front of the Short People. They were clearly relieved that we hadn't, and suggested that it would be best to wait until the Short People napped to pop it in the stereo. I understood where they were coming from as I listened to lyrics that included some rather graphic descriptions of why the Special Ed needs to "get me some of them pills" (Viagra) and waxes poetic about his "Dirty Baby"'s nether regions. I don't think we'll add this one to the "shuffle" function of our CD player.

One of the most entertaining parts of any music festival is wandering the crowd, llistening to the pick-up bands and people-watching. We witnessed some sort of RV red-carpeted bluegrass award ceremony (they really had a red carpet), lots of pickers, fiddlers, cloggers, flatfooters, and even the odd harmonic player which reportedly inflamed some of the serious old time musicians (harmonicas were not used in true old time music). My favorites were these enormous unmentionables pictured on the left that provided both shade and entertainment. When Tracy escorted the Short People past and asked "Girls, have you ever seen underwear that large?" one of the inhabitants patted the girls on the head and drawled "well, I guess you haven't seen my wife".

After the Fiddler's Convention we just kept heading west to Abingdon to visit Tracy's family. The first night we pulled out Tracy's brother's karaoke machine and I think I made Patsy Kline spin like a rotisserie chicken in her grave. We had such a good time that I forgot to pull out the camera and take any pictures ( I am quite thankful there are no photos of my rendition of "Crazy"). I also neglected to take pictures of my father, Clare and Derek or Sue and Mark. I always do this; when I am just hanging around I will snap away with vigor but give me a party and my focus is having fun. I apologize to all my neglected family and friends and will make an attempt to do better next time, but I can't make any promises. A party is a party!

2007-07-27T16:39:00.000-05:00

Many fish bites if ya got good bait

Here's a little tip I would like to relate

Big fish bites if ya got a good bait

I 'a goin' fishin'

Yes, I'm goin' fishin'

And my baby goin' fishin' too

Taj Mahal -- "Big Fish Blues"

The above photo is for my father. Katie P. is doin' her Daden proud in the fishing department; she likes the challenge, the glory, and most especially the eating. That's my girl.

Art Camp officially ended today. Bye-bye, 8:30 t0 5:00 break from the oldest Short Person. I am mostly pleased, because I did miss her very much, but it was wonderful to have so many fight-free days.

India had a ball, and came home laden with an appalling amount of unidentifiable glazed clay figurines, a new tie-dye shirt (we just can't have enough of those in this house), a papier mache hat covered with blobs of tissue paper, an array of drawings and lots of new skills, including PLATE SPINNING. They did a "circus" segment, that included tumbling, juggling, etc. Thank goodness she hasn't asked to hone those skills at home.

Her favorite class by far was music (imagine that) and she surprised her teacher with the selections she brought in, which ranged from Del McCoury and Bobby Darin to Spanish music. I had to steer her away from her perennial favorite, "Willin'". Call me crazy, but I just didn't think the "weed, whites and wine" line would go over well. Although, after getting a good look at the music teacher and the bumper stickers on her guitar case, it might have been a welcome addition.

Notice that India is by far the tiniest in her little group. She's at about the 10% percentile...odd given that Tracy is 6ft 2in and I am 5ft 7in. I do have to say, though, that despite her height her apple didn't fall far from our tree!

The weather is looking dreadful this weekend, so beach and boating is out. I suppose that means Tracy and I may have to face painting the bookshelves we have had sitting unfinished in our den since Christmas. Damn. Somebody's gonna have to break it to Kate that she won't be fishin' this weekend, and it's not gonna be me.

2007-07-26T07:11:00.000-05:00

Back in black

I hit the sack

I've been too long

I'm glad to be back

Yes, I'm let loose

From the noose

That's kept me hanging about

ACDC -- "Back in Black"

Well, sort of back. I'm moving a bit slow. I'm three weeks out from surgery and for the last few days I finally feel better. It was not a fun process, but the ENT feels like he was successful in removing all the staph infection. After a 2.5 hour surgery, I should hope he got it all. I can't say I notice an improvement yet given all the swelling and other unmentionable side effects of the procedure, but if he feels confident, then I'm going with his opinion. Luckily, he does not utilize packing so I missed out on some of the more painful aspects of the surgery that some friends experienced, nor did I bleed from the eyes like my friend Louise's husband (thank god). I do have to go in weekly for a procedure that I will not describe for you. Let's just say that a pain pill is beneficial before each visit. Thank you, Percocet!

It's been a difficult few weeks around here, but we got by with a little help from our friends (perhaps I should have used that song as an into) and family. Tracy's parents took the Short People for a week, and my Mom stayed with us for a week. Many of my wonderful women friends kept us VERY well fed, and I received flowers, phone calls and cards galore. We feel very lucky to have such a great support system. Thank you! You have no idea how much you helped us through.

Now comes the climbing out of the hole portion of the show. I am appallingly weak and I find this incredibly frustrating. I haven't exercised in about 10 months, I've been taking Prednisone for months (this causes significant weight gain), and I've been bedridden off and on for months, so I am fat and blobby. None of my clothes fit and I can't even wear my wedding rings; perhaps another intro song could have been Queen's "Fat Bottom Girls". I am hoping to be able to head back to the gym very soon and start working some of this weight off.

In the meantime I am trying to get back to a normal life. Today's photos are from a cookout with friends on Saturday and a beach outing on Sunday. They were my first outings and took a lot of energy out of me but were such great therapy! It was fabulous to leave the house for something other than a post-op visit. Since the Short People really haven't experienced a good snow, they invented their own version of "snow angels". Some of the mystique is lost, but it did work, as you can see.

2007-06-25T21:13:00.000-05:00

Well I swear your perfume babe

Is made out of turnip greens

Well every time I kiss you girl it tastes like pork and beans

Even though you're wearing those uptown high heels

I can tell from your giant step you've been walking through the cotton fields

Ohhhhhh, you're so down homegirl

Old Crow Medicine Show --"Down Home Girl"

You can take the girl out of Southwest Virginia...

Last Wednesday Tracy and I and two other couples traveled "across the bay" (Eastern Shore slang for Norfolk or Va Beach) to see Old Crow Medicine Show. It was great! They are a "newgrass" band with a sense of humor and fantastic musicianship. The photo above is my new bumper sticker; it's my own little way of coolin' up the grocery getter. We've been fans of OCMS for a while and especially enjoy some of the more locally-themed songwriting, like "James River Blues" and "Virginia Creeper". You can check them out at: http://www.crowmedicine.com/. Enjoy!

After we all recovered from arriving home at 12:30am (I'm just to old for that), we got busy attending several parties, heading to the beach, and generally enjoying our summer. The Short People are loving the weather and the almost daily playdates with friends, but are suffering a bit from the lack of structure. Let's just say I would make a great referee for the World Wrestling Federation.

One of the most difficult aspects of having the girls home every day is grocery shopping. They ride in the cart until it is too full, then I ask them to get out and walk. Their idea of walking is to hang on to either side of the cart for dear life, occasionally letting go to grab something inappropriate and beg for it. This means that our combined mass is almost as wide as an aisle. This also means that we bump into everyone and everything in reach. I spend most of the time hissing "LET GO OF THE CART!" in my trying-to-discipline-on-the-sly voice.

Last week the nice checkout lady gave them each a balloon, and on the way home India asked "Mommy, will you sing the balloon song please?". Well, I wracked my brain trying to figure out what she was talking about. Exasperated, India said "You know, Mommy...balloon, despair, and agony on me; whhhooaaa!" On the next grocery trip India and Kate were on the hunt for spare change (faithful readers will remember that this is a favorite Short People past-time); they were so disappointed at checkout when there was not a penny in sight. The woman in front of me secretly dropped two pennies on the ground for the girls to "find". I think since I've become a parent I see so much more of people's generous side.

I am on a pre-op Prednisone high and taking advantage of this energy burst to get a few things done before my sinus surgery on July 3rd. Today I scrubbed and polished the antique marble sinktops upstairs that are such a pain to clean, organized the Short People's many hair accessories, ran several errands, caught up on laundry, wrote some thank you notes for the Hospital Auxiliary , and completed some correspondence regarding the Hospice fundraiser I am co-chairing. Whew! But it's time to make hay while the sun shines, as the Southwestern Virginia saying goes. I'm such a down home girl.

Father's Day Weekend" Part II

2007-06-21T17:50:00.000-05:00

Oh Daddy,

You soothe me with your smile

You're letting me know

You're the best thing in my life

Fleetwood Mac -- "Oh, Daddy"

Happy, Happy Father's Day (belatedly posted) to Tracy. The Short People and I are so lucky to have you.

To honor Tracy, the Turmanators spent Father's day on the seaside of our Eastern Shore. This is, hands down, our favorite spot here...the reason we live in this special place.

The seaside is dotted with several Barrier Islands. These Islands are a series of very small, unihabited land masses that protect our coastline and are teeming with wildlife. Biologists studying our Islands have stated that they are some of the most productive on the planet, and The Nature Conservancy works steadily to prevent these jewels from development so they will remain wild and untamed, just like we like them.

Hard to believe that this oasis is, perhaps, a half hour's trip from our home. The unspoiled landscape is a sight to behold. The pictured buildings are an abandoned coast guard station on Cedar Island that featured in a short-lived 1960's development scheme and is now a privately-owned hunting lodge. Power is gererator-operated and the bugs are FEROCIOUS. Not sure I would want to spend more than a night or two but it would be worth some bug bites (even the Eastern Shore kind) to wake up to a sunrise here.

Father's Day was a perfect day on the seaside. The boating was smooth despite running aground twice. This is a common occurance on the seaside because the landscape changes almost weekly; the currents and storms are forever altering our coastline, making it a bit unpredictable. Unless you ruin your motor (we didn't) you just have to get out and push a bit. Tracy and I both got out and sank to our shins in good ole seaside muck and set off.

One of my favorite things about the seaside is the beachcombing (yes, Janice, I missed Pat terribly. No one else appreciated my delight over jingle shells, chunks of sea glass and a whale vertebrae). You never know what you will find. I once stumbled upon a perfectly preserved, puffed-up puffer fish. So cool. Hermit crabs are rampant, and I have also seen giant manta rays, sharks, sea snakes, millions of turtles, and have heard tales of sea otters. Some islands inhabit deer and raccoon as well.

For Tracy, the day would have been Nirvana had the fishing been good. It wasn't. But he and our friend, John, had a great time casting while baiting the hooks of our collective children, smoking cigars, and reveling in the day. Susan and I enjoyed walking on the beach and a swim. Bet you can't guess where we are heading next weekend!

Father's Day Weekend: Part I

2007-06-18T18:45:00.000-05:00

I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay

Watching the tide roll away

I'm just sittin' on the dock of the bay

Wastin' time.

Otis Redding -- "Sitting on the Dock of the Bay"

Welcome to the maiden voyage of the Miss IndiKate! Old Shoreman lore dictates you name your boat after your daughters because "your wife can leave you but your children never will". Aside: I wanted to call the boat the "Freudian Sloop"...Tracy said "But honey, it's not a sloop"! Men are so literal. Our boat is truly a bit small for an offical name, but to us it is the "Miss IndiKate". Funny, Dad and I both came up with the same name. Great minds, huh Dad? The "Miss Short People" just doesn't have the same ring.

Saturday was our first time out with the Miss IndiKate. We chose the Bayside for this excursion because 1)it is a bit easier to navigate and 2) we wanted to spend all day Father's Day on the seaside on an island. The weather was perfect and the boat ran relatively smoothly. Tracy was amazing at docking and trailering, and managed to navigate the tricky idle and keep us from being stranded. I was duly impressed! Once he has the hang of things I want to learn how to do all of it too. It would be fun, for one thing, and, as Tracy says, I need to know how to take over if he "has a stroke or something". Sometimes being married to someone who works in a hospital is so cheery! I just worry about everyone's emotional stability; Tracy worries about Avian Flu and COPD.

We put in at Harborton, a little Bayside town with a public access dock about 5 minutes from our home, and were joined by our friends the Masons. A quick lesson in Eastern Shore vocab...if your family is from the Shore you are referred to as a From Here.If you have been here for two generations or less you are a Come Here. John and Susan are From Heres. They know all the nooks and crannies of the Bayside and seaside, who's waterfront home is who's, and interesting little tidbits about various spots.

The pictures from today are all from our Bayside trip on Pungoteague Creek. The Shore is covered with "creeks", like fingers of water that stretch from the shoreline out to the Bay and the seaside. The coastline here is not smooth like the Outer Banks. The photo below on the left is of a shack on a sandbar right at the mouth of the Bay. Tracy kayaked past this shack several years ago just as the remnants of a bachelor party, including strippers boated over from Hampton Roads, staggered out for the boat ride back to the mainland.

On the other end of the spectrum is the large waterfront home pictured above. The Shore is full of very old homes that look much like this one. What a view they have!

Our "Day on the Bay" was the perfect way to kick off a Father's Day weekend. Tracy was in boat-owner heaven and it is fantastic that the Short People are finally old enough that we can do these things as a family. Next post: The Seaside.

2007-06-14T06:15:00.000-05:00

Boat drinks

Waitress I need two more boat drinks

Then I'm headin south 'fore my dream shrinks

I gotta go where its warm

Jimmy Buffet -- "Boat Drinks"

Ahoy, Matie! After a decade of living on the Eastern Shore of Virginia, who's true beauty is only visible by leaving the shore line, we are finally boat owners.

We picked it up (I just refuse to call the boat a HER) last Sunday. We must purchase a few additions to please the Coast Guard gods and then we may go for our maiden voyage. The weather looks great for Saturday and Sunday so I hope to return laden with tales of adventure, bags of whelks, and a camera full of photos for you to enjoy. Until then, check out the Short People pretending to fish and crab from the boat. Tracy was so proud!

But, in true Turman fashion, we buy a boat and three days later find out that we will be unable to enjoy it as much as we'd like. I continue to have a raging staph infection in my sinuses despite three months of hefty antibiotics. I don't feel great, either, as you can imagine. So I will be having that terrible sinus surgery. Yuck! It will be completely worth it if it helps me feel better, but it will interfere with sailing the high seas (or the Bay and sound, anyway). It will also make caring for the Short People a bit difficult. Once we know when I will have the surgery we are going to have to piece together some child care.

Besides the boat pictures, I am posting a photo of India that I took at the request of my friend Sally, who is the Marketing Director for our hospital. She needed a photo of a child wearing a hat in a playground setting for an article coming out in the hospital newsletter. Kate refused to participate. She is one stubborn girl!

The other photo illustrates the Short People after a playdate with their friends Ellie and Anne. The are in a newly-built home with dirt ALL around. They played all afternoon in the dirt and then snacked on popsicles. Notice the rivulets of popsickle juice that trickled through the dirt on Kate's legs. After I took this photo the Short People were ordered to strip right there on the porch and march right upstairs for a bath. I briefly considered taking a photo of the aftermath in the tub, so shocking was it's condition. I think I could've repotted a few plants with the soil left in the bath.

2007-06-10T07:19:00.000-05:00

Isnt she lovely

Isnt she wonderful...

I never thought through love we'd be

Making one as lovely as she

But isnt she lovely made from love
Stevie Wonder -- "Isn't She Lovely"

Happy Happy Birthday to my 5 year old Short Person! India's birthday was June 6th and we celebrated twice; a trip to Richmond to visit my parents over the 6th and then a ballerina birthday party on Saturday the 9th.

Nothing says happy birthday like 12 little divas in tutus. India requested a ballerina party for her friends; "No boys this year, Mommy!" . Basically we covered the house in pink and white crepe paper and pink balloons, gave each girls a tutu and let them loose in the yard to act like anything but graceful, calm, serene ballerinas. Oh, and there was a ballet slipper pinata that some of these girls wailed on like Charlie Watts.

There was one little bump on the road to birthday party bliss; the cake. I love to bake cakes for the Short People's birthdays and this year India requested a pink ballerina cake with pink icing. I found some directions for making a ballet slipper cake and worked most of the day friday on baking, tinting icing, etcetera. When I started adding the crumb coat the cake was literally crumbling into hunks. Long story short, I placed an urgent phone call at 4:15 on Friday to Kate's Cupboard for an emergency birthday cake to be ready at 10:00 Saturday morning. There was a lot of cursing under my breath, for sure, but as long as there is icing and ice cream (they really don't even eat the cake) everyone is happy. Even me. Once I got over the temper tantrum, that is.

Today we are off to pick up a present for Tracy (and the rest of us, too)...A BOAT! We have lived here for almost 10 years without a boat, and now we are finally going to be able to reach the barrier islands and they Bay whenever we want. We have both seaside and bayside access 5 minutes from our home. Chez Turman B&B is open for business. Any takers?

2007-06-07T16:47:00.000-05:00

She poured some of the wine from the bottle into the glass

And raised it to her lips

And just before she drank it,

She said: Spill the wine and take that pearl

War with Eric Burden --

"Spill the Wine"

Been out of town a few days to visit my parents and celebrate India's 5th birthday. Happy Birthday, sweetheart! I'll do a birthday post later, but I just had to squeeze in a quick post about last Saturday night.

Tracy and I and another couple went to a cocktail party and then out to Bizotto's, one of our favorite local restaurants. We ordered a nice bottle of pinot noir and then wanted another. We all enjoy wine and love to try different bottles, so we selected another variety. The discussion with our waiter went a little sump'm like dis:

Tracy: We'd like another bottle of pinot noir, but we'd like to try the cheaper bottle this time.

Waiter: The mumble mumble mumble?

Tracy: I think so; the $20 bottle.

The waiter brought the bottle and as Tracy tasted it:

Tracy: I must be a cheap date...I like this much better than the first bottle!

Well folks, we had a great time laughing and talking and knowing someone else was putting our children to bed, so we lingered over our dinners, then dessert and coffee. When the waiter brought the bill (we were the last table in the restaurant) Tracy looked it over and burst into hysterical laughter. Everyone begged to know what was so darn funny, but he was speechless so he passed the bill around the table and everyone reacted with either laughter or stunned silence.

WE DRANK A $170 BOTTLE OF WINE.

OH. MY. GOD.

I was ready to offer to wash dishes, especially after we determined that our waiter was Mr. Bizotto's son. Miguel Bizotto, who is not only the owner but is also the chef, came out and talked to us. After scamming some free medical advice from our friend about a recent burn, he agreed to charge us $70 for the wine. His son stated that he thought Tracy requested the "million dollar" bottle of pinot noir.

Lesson #1: Read the label on your bottle

Lesson #2: Remember that markup on wine from wholesale is about 120%

Today's photos are from our recent trip to Maymont Park in Richmond http://www.maymont.org/ . Take notes; I know we all want to copy these garden designs for our own homes.

2007-06-01T18:37:00.000-05:00

As you start to lose your grip

You will stumble as you slip
As you tripped at every step

Elvis Costello -- "You Tripped at Every Step"
OR

I am getting so tired

Of standing in this light

Can't you hear me cry.

Boo, hoo, hoo, boo, hoo, hoo

Neil Young -- "Cry, Cry, Cry"

I just couldn't decide which song would most appropriately represent the Short People's preschool graduation ceremony, so I opted for both. Now, I know all you intelligent readers are thinking...did someone fall? Did someone cry?

Why yes.

India fell completely off the top bleachers during her graduation ceremony. I was watching through the lens of my camera and one minute she was there, smiling away, and the next she vanished. She was quickly scooped up by a teacher, cuddled, and returned. She stood bravely, smiling, singing and doing every hand motion perfectly with big tears running down her cheeks. Ever the performer, India knew that the show must go on.

Kate, on the other hand, could care less about showmanship. Nor did she have any excuse for sobbing through much of the ceremony. She just felt overwhelmed and shy. She managed to pull it together for the portion where each child introduces themselves, and felt comfortable enough to show the entire audience her underwear as her peers took their turns, but later became so hysterical that they had to remove her from the stage and bring her to us.

There is only room for one Short People diva, and I think India is it.

In other graduation news one girl repeatedly pulled her dress over her head, a little boy wet his pants, and there plenty of nose-picking and hitting. There was even one incident of sexual harrassment as a boy lifted up India's friend Allie's dress and took a peek. Allie retaliated by pinching him a couple of times...you go, Allie! Can't wait to see the DVD.

2007-05-28T20:24:00.000-05:00

Bicycle bicycle bicycle...

I want to ride my bike

I want to ride my bicycle

I want to ride it where I like

Queen -- "Bicyle Race"

It was an early birthday celebration this holiday weekend as Tracy's parents came for a visit, bringing with them lots of goodies for India, the soon-to-be five year old Short Person. She was thrilled with her fancy pink bike. We spent lots of time outside playing and Pops fixed the reverse on the Short People's gator. Yay! No more running into things then parking and walking away because they couldn't back the thing up. It was beginning to look like the crash test institute around here. Thanks, Dex.

We also hit the annual CBES Pig Roast (Citizens for a Better Eastern Shore: http://www.cbes.org/about_mission.asp). This event is a fundraiser for CBES, an organization that lobbies for a cleaner, well-preserved environment, cautious development and local control of our Eastern Shore. Another organization I plan to volunteer with sometime...I'll just add it to the list. The Roast is held on some property that belongs to the family of a friend of mine, the lucky girl. Just look at that view! There are hay rides and contests for the children, lots of good friends, the odd politician, and plenty of mosquitos. Welcome to the Shore.

Today we played HARD, spending the day welcoming the uofficial start to summer. And it feels like it! We also constructed a teepee for the Short People; all I have to do is finish wrapping it with twine and then plant some sweet peas and moonflowers and VOILA, and wonderful play tent. Now we are all exhausted, especially Fontella. Hope your long weekend was fun-filled, too.

2007-05-22T05:17:00.000-05:00

Tell it to me

Drink the corn liquor

Let the cocaine be

Cocaine is gonna kill my honey dead

Old Crow Medicine Show -- "Tell It To Me"

ME: Hello, my name is Amy and I'm a Computer Game Aholic.

CHORUS: HI, AMY!

Welcome to CGAA (Computer Game Aholic's Anonymous). Come with me as I work the 12 steps.

1) Admit that I am powerless over computer games and that my life has become unmanagable (example: "Just five more minutes, girls, and then I'll fix your dinner. It's only 9:00...you can't be that hungry!")

2) Come to believe that a Higher Power can restore me to sanity (example: "That pile of laundry, stack of paperwork, and grocery list is calling me...can you hear it?")

3) Make a decision to turn my will and life over to....

Aahhh, forget it! I'll just keep playing.

I've become hooked on computer puzzle games. In particular I am obsessed with the Nancy Drew series, in which you play the detective and explore all kinds of fabulous locations (a creepy mansion with secret passages, an inn and surrounding villiage, a train) while collecting clues and figuring our "whodoneit". They are wonderful! Right up my alley. I love mystery/suspense books and movies and these games are truly amazing.

The only problem is real life keeps intruding, damn it. Children, dogs, telephones, meetings, household chores, basic personal care...little things like these. At least Tracy is finished with his Masters so I can have access to the computer at night.

Fontella is settling in nicely. She is keeping us up quite a bit at night (2-3 times) but hardly ever has accidents in the house and has already learned to love her crate. Yay! It's going to be a tough week here, though, because Tracy is out of town and I am on deck each night for baby duty. It was almost easier with the Short People because I didn't have to shlep down the stairs and outside! I just walked across the hall, nursed them and put them back in their crib.

I wish I could say Daisy Jane is adjusting as well as the rest of us. On 'Tella's first day Daisy was thrilled with this novel creature but now she is mostly annoyed and at times just plain pissed. She growls whenever Fontella tries to play with her and has found some remarkable places to hide. She is spending increasing amounts of time outside alone, which is not like her. I'm trying to give her lots of extra attention and treats. Hopefully she will settle down soon. Anyone have any suggestions?

Time to wrap this up...I think I can squeeze in a few minutes of a game before the Short People wake up!

2007-05-20T05:53:00.000-05:00

Ballerina, you must have seen her

dancing in the sand

And now she's in me, always with me,

a tiny dancer in my hand

Elton John -- "Tiny Dancer"

Whew...the week of Never Ending Ballet Rehearsals and Performances has come to an end.

India is not a diva; she is not dramatic or attention-seeking in the way of many of her funny little friends. At times she is quite shy. So it is quite a surprise how much she enjoys the performances. I'm thrilled for her; I think ballet is a great way to learn poise and discipline.

With that said, the process of reaching the performance is looong. Arduous. Exhausting. Painful. Imagine a small high school classroom cram-packed with 40 excited, hyperactive children. Mothers scurrying around armed to the teeth with hairspray and bobby pins, attempting to wrestle their child's hair into the requisite tight ballerina bun. Costumes flying, cameras snapping wildly, and our own little hole in the ozone from the cloud of Final Net.

Scary, right? But even more horrific are the surroundings. The School Gods wisely chose the nursing students' room for our green room. Looking like something from "Silence of the Lambs", it is outfitted with no fewer than four hospital beds, three of which are the resting place for Resuscitator Annies. In one corner is a plastic life-size skeleton. There are models of teeth, eyes and ears strategically placed around the room. Medical equipment and charts of breast self-exam instructions as far as the eye can see.

WHAT WERE THEY THINKING???? Preschoolers and medical equipment? Give me a break. Let's just say that by the end of the first dress rehearsal one Annie's hospital gown was pulled down with breasts exposed to the world and another was sporting a jaunty pink hair bow. Poor Mr. Skeleton had lost an arm and the hospital bed controls were being used as stethoscopes and defibrillator for tiny budding physicians.

I valiantly tried to keep the Short People clear of the defacement of thousands of dollars worth of medical equipment. I pressed crayons and art paper on these girls like a drug pusher. Success! The Short People and a handful of friends were ignoring the rampant exploration of human anatomy! I was so proud. Little did I know danger was lurking at the art table.

As I sat watching someone else's child playing with a box labeled "Vaginal Swabs and Anal Probes" (I kid you not) I overheard one of India's friends whisper, "Girls...I've brought some body glitter!"

What the hell? What is a preschooler doing with body glitter (for that matter, what does anyone need with body glitter)? As sweet little Molly Kate whips Sex Appeal in a Bottle out of her ballet bag, I successfully steer India towards a potty break. Whew! Another crisis averted. Or so I thought.

At the bathroom I find another of India's friends. Several of us moms had agreed to take turns waiting backstage for our children so the others could rush out and watch the performance from the audience. We traded off duties so the others could watch the next night. It was my night in the hole, and I was responsible for this little darling who, three minutes before going onstage chose to URINATE IN HER COSTUME!!!!!

The poor thing had completely soaked her leotard, tights and slippers. I was paralyzed with indecision. What do I do? All the other girls, including India, were lining up in the wings for their cue. This girl's mom was waiting in the audience to see her child on stage, so no help there. Thankfully another friend had a spare pair of tights. The skirt of the costume covered the wet leotard so we quickly cleaned her up and sent her on her way.

Oh, am I exhausted. Ballet is not for sissies!

2007-05-17T15:37:00.000-05:00

Rescue me
Take me in your arms.
Rescue me
I want your tender charm .
'Cause I'm lonely
And I'm blue
I need you
And your love too.
Come on and rescue me
Fontella Bass -- "Rescue Me"

The Turmanators are pleased to introduce to you the newest member of the family...drumroll please...

Fontella Bass!

Fontella is obviously named after the singer of the above-quoted song. It's a perfect name for a rescued pound puppy, and is a favorite of mine as well. It's a big name for such a tiny girl but she'll grow into it, I'm sure.

We are big believers in supporting our animal shelters. The only difficult thing was walking past all the other cages full of sad-eyed dogs, then leaving her brother and sisters behind. A little tempting to take them all. But only a little. If this tempts anyone to add a pet to your home, please utilize your local shelter.

Isn't she the cutest little girl? She stole my heart with her wide-spaced eyes and sweet piggy nose. She's mostly lab, web feet and all; she was even taking a dip in her water bowl when I first saw her. But she has a curly little tail that is is a soupcon of chow and a brindle coat that hints at a pinch of pit bull.

Despite that ferocious ancestry she is actually a sweet little gem. She eagerly shows me her soft underbelly, trots along dutifully behind me, and mostly just wants to snuggle up and sleep. She does, however, have a healthy set of lungs and uses them to express some definite ideas about where she will and will not sleep: preferably beside somone, and certainly not in her crate).

So it's back to sleepless nights for us. And cleaning up poo. But at least that part doesn't last long, and we don't have to start saving for college tuition. Welcome, 'Tella!

2007-05-16T07:37:00.000-05:00

Happy anniversary baby
Got you on my mind...
Little River Band -- "Happy Anniversary"

FIFTEEN
YEARS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow.

And if you include the years we dated (two or three different times) Tracy and I have been together over 20 years. Notice the tres 80s prom photo. For folks not yet 40 that is pretty amazing, if we do say so ourselves.

Although, with my recent illnesses and subsequent weight gain, poor Tracy may be ready to trade me in for a newer model. But he would have a fight on his hands, for sure.

We aren't doing too much to celebrate tonight. This week is all-ballet-all-the-time with practice every night and performances Friday and Saturday, so the Short People and I will not get home tonight until after 6:30. So for tonight it's a romantic candlelight dinner of steamed shimp shared with the Short People ("Mommy, I want more shrimpies....Daddy, peel more now please...I don't like the sauce...etc"). Saturday night we have a babysitter and we are heading out for a real romantic dinner. 'Til then, "Happy Anniversary Baby, got you on my mind"!

2007-05-13T19:38:00.000-05:00

She works hard for the money,
so hard for it honey.
She works hard for the money
so you better treat her right.
Donna Summer -- "She Works Hard for the Money"

The Turmanators had a fun-filled weekend. I've posted photos from our Dance Party, herb bed gardening, making ourselves up with sidewalk chalk, and our Mother's Day trip to the Science Museum. I woke up this morning to fresh coffee, beautiful Mother's Day cards, tulips selected by the Short People, and a fantastic stone mortar and pestle. I've been wanting one forever and TRACY REMEMBERED! What a great husband.

But with the Turmanators something untoward has to happen. No, it's not India's 4,981 trips to restrooms all over Virginia Beach. It wasn't even Kate's ear-splitting shrieks of terror at the splashing stingrays (which I, of course, could have played with forever...you get to TOUCH them). It was...Blatant Moneygrubbing.

We stopped at Starbucks on our way to Virginia Marine Science Museum for a Cafe Mocha for me. India and Kate, ever on the lookout for coinage, joyously informed me that they found a quarter. We have been saving all our change for a trip to Disneyworld in an effort to teach the Short People about money, and they love dropping it in the jar. Anyway, they decided they needed more, and I watched them in horror as they rushed to the seating area and proceed to LOOK UNDER ALL THE COUCH CUSHIONS! I'm sure all the other patrons thought we taught them to do this. Next they'll start checking soda and candy machines for spare change. If you catch them panhandling on the streetcorner, don't tell me. How embarrassing.

Mother's Day used to be a difficult holiday for me. We spent 3 years, lots of savings, and plenty of heartache trying to have children. Who knew we would end up with two beautiful girls in under 2 years? I try to take time to remember those hard Mother's Days, because they help me appreciate the fun ones so much more. I truly enjoyed our day today; the Museum, lunch out, and time just the four of us. I am so grateful for my Short People. They wear me out, but I love them desperately. And who wouldn't; sidewalk chalk and all!

2007-05-09T08:19:00.000-05:00

Pretty in pink
Isn't she?
Pretty in pink
Isn't she?
Psychedelic Furs -- "Pretty in Pink"

Boy, did I love that song - that group. Dates me a little, huh? It stuck in my head as I snapped photos of the Short People entertaining themselves in the front yard in their pink shirts yesterday afternoon. They actually ignored me for a full 15 minutes while they picked buttercups. I was able to talk to my friend Janice (Hi, Janice!) for a looooong time without the usual whining and infighting. Wonderful!

I don't intentionally dress the Short People alike; they insist on it. If one has a ponytail, skirt, sandals, ______(fill in the blank) the other must sport said item as well. Earlier in the day Kate had a ponytail just like India's but she took it out. They were also wearing matching shoes. Today they are wearing matching dresses. I kid you not, if one has a BM the other will seek out a free bathroom to follow suit. Really.

I returned to the YMCA today for the first time in over 5 months. OUCH! I was pitifully out of shape but it felt great to be back. Kate had missed the KidsKare room and fully enjoyed herself, too. Maybe I'm on the road to recovery?Can't go today; we have playgroup this morning, but I'm planning to head back tomorrow.

Tonight Tracy logs on to his Master's Program to complete homework FOR THE LAST TIME. The past two years of his on-line schoolwork have been painful for all concerned, but mostly for him and I am so happy for and proud of him. Congratulations! We're celebrating with a Family Fiesta tonight...mambo music, dancing and yummy Mexican food. Celebramos!

2007-05-06T16:59:00.000-05:00

Kodachrome

They give us those nice bright colors

They give us the greens of summers

Makes you think all the world's a sunny day, oh yeah.

I got a Nikon camera

I love to take a photograph

So mama don't take my Kodachrome away

Paul Simon -- Kodachrome

Sometimes it isn't easy living in the middle of the Chesapeake Bay.

On Wednesday I set out for the Chincoteague Seafood Festival armed with my camera, fully prepared to document the beauty and bounty of my home. I snapped three photos as we entered the Festival and then...nothing. Nada. Zilch. So much for the mouthwatering photos of the fabulous steamed clams, raw oysters, clam fritters, sweet potato fries, fried trout sandwiches...oh, so delicious. Forget the shots of the happy crowd or the errant Chincoteague pony. My camera battery conked out.

No big deal, right? Except we have few stores here (not even the ever-present Wal Mart, although that is on its way) and I couldn't find the battery anywhere! Finally found one on Friday, just in time to set out for ShoreFest.

Yes, there are lots of "Fests" on the Shore. This particular "Fest" is a fundraiser for our Hospital. Since Shore Health Services keeps us clothed and fed we are big supporters, and this particular fundraiser is decorated by yours truly. My friend Sally is the Marketing and Development Director and she gives me a budget and lets me go crazy. I love doing this stuff, especially with someone else's money.

This year's theme was the Fabulous Fifties and I managed to procure a mint condition '57 Chevy to park out front. Soooo super cool and I didn't get a shot of it or the front room, but I did take a picture of the dining tables. We sold the gumball machines on each table, and everyone had a fantastic time having too many cocktails and doing unspeakable things with the Mr. Potato Heads. There is a golf tournament and a big auction; I bought a trip to the Hotel Hershey Spa and my Mom, Sis and I are going...I love to bid and it seems to bring out my competitive side. All in all we raised about 45k for our Cancer Center; the most profitable ShoreFest yet!

2007-05-01T14:08:00.000-05:00

Well, who are you?

I really wanna know

Tell me, who are you?

'Cause I really wanna know

(Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)

The Who -- "Who Are You"

Thanks to Deana at Friday Night Fish Fry you are going to learn more about me than you may truly want to know, but her questions are great ones so here goes:

1. How did you and your husband decide on where you currently live? We live on the Eastern Shore of Virginia; part of the Delmarva Peninsula in the middle of the Chesapeake Bay. Before moving here we were childless, living in Richmond and both working TOO MUCH. I was a therapist at an adolescent residential treatment facility and on call 5 nights a week ("Mrs. Turman, so and so locked herself in the closet and won't come out...what do we do?"). I drove a road rage-inducing commute full of toll booths and traffic jams. Tracy was the administrator of a nursing facility and working 50-60 hours a week. I loved Richmond but we didn't want to raise children like that; when would we ever see them? Tracy received a call from a headhunter about a job here with the local hospital and we took a big risk and moved. I cried the whole way across the Bay Bridge Tunnel, but now you couldn't drag me away. The pace is slow, the water is wonderful, the people are kind, and we love it.

2. If you could take your daughters on a trip to any historic site in the world where would it be and why? (all expenses paid of course). The Galapagos Islands. Not historic in the traditional sense of the word, but it is THE manifestation of evolution and nature. This is where Darwin formed his Theory of Relativity and is now an ecotourism site. The home of the famous turtles, as well as iguanas who swim, fabulous scuba diving, gorgeous flora and fauna, and supposedly pretty untouched. I've always wanted to go, and it would be the perfect way to teach the Short People respect for our world and all it's creatures. Since we are going all expenses paid, let's charter a big yacht with a chef!

3. What flavor Lifesaver would YOU be and why? Does anyone remember the tropical lifesavers? I don't know if they make those anymore, but I loved those and the coconut one was my favorite. Creamy white. Bonus: they remind me of sitting in church with my Grandmother Makey. Whenever I got antsy she would dig in her purse and pull out a roll of those.

4. If you could have any video clip from your childhood, any time period, that you could share with your daughters and Tracy what favorite memory would it be and why? Funny, my Mom and I were just talking about this memory. I always loved the opening day of trout fishing in my hometown. Sounds strange, I know, but our family held a big reunion on that day every year. Everyone would bring wonderful Southern picnic food (deviled eggs, fried chicken, ham biscuits) and pig out, then at 12:00 the streams would open and we would all make a mad dash to fish. We made so much noise that no one caught much, but we had a fantastic time. Today my family has spread far and wide and family reunions happen rarely. I grieve this loss for my girls. It would be wonderful to have a video clip of these moments to share with Tracy and the Short People because they contributed greatly to the values I hold dear today.

5. You love music. You must make the girls a cd that represents your life best. It is to help them know you better when they are older. You can have up to 10 songs on this cd. What songs do you pick to go on this CD? Boy, do I love this question! The problem was narrowing the selections down to 10. Some are symbolic and some I selected just because I love them so. If you asked me this question tomorrow I might have completely different selections but for today they are:

1) Amy -- Pure Prairie League (the obvious choice)

2) R.E.S.P.E.C.T. -- Aretha Franklin

3) Groove Is In The Heart -- DeeLite ( gotta have a little dance music)

4) James River Blues -- Old Crow Medicine Show (a little touch of Richmond)

5) Take 5 -- Dave Brubeck Quartet

6) You and Me -- Neil Young (reminds me of Tracy and I)

7) In My Life -- The Beatles (I sing this to the Short People every night...they call it "Mommy's Song")

8) Pathetique -- Beethoven

9) Immortality -- Pearl Jam

10) Rock 'N Roll Woman -- Buffalo Springfield (it was written about Joni Mitchell but I like to pretend it's written for me)

If anyone else wants to play along then follow these directions:

1. Leave me a comment saying "Interview me."

2. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.

3. You will update your weblog or leave a comment with the answers to the questions.

4., You will include the explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Today's photos are from our first trip to Cape Charles beach on Sunday. Summer is coming...YAY!

2007-04-25T17:50:00.000-05:00

If you'll be my Dixie chicken
I'll be your Tenessee lamb.
And we can walk together
down in Dixieland...
--Little Feat "Dixie Chicken"

The site of beer can chicken never fails to crack me up. I just expect the little guy to break into soft shoe or something. A bit o' Gregory Hines.

This was dinner...so delicious. It's the only recipe that comes close to matching the rotisserie chicken I grew up eating from Alexander's Food Market in my hometown. Fabulous! To me it tastes like Sunday after church. All my vegetarian and vegan friends can skip the next phrase, but the Short People beg for the skin. They love it!

Today was a special day for the Short People. Not for the beer can chicken, but because we attended kindergarten registration.

I feel I'm expected to crumple with unbearable sadness, but I felt...excited! Some of my friends grieve kindergarten enrollment like a death, but I am thrilled for India. My firstborn Short Person is setting out on the journey to become her own woman. That is my (probably horrifying, but I'll admit it) take on kindergarten.

I have always known I was not destined to me a "baby mother"; one of the patient, kind women who gladly sacrifice their own needs (sleep, relationship with spouse, basic hygeine, sleep, own interests, awareness of current events, sleep ) to care for tiny, utterly dependent beings. Professionally much of my counseling has been with adolescents and I know that is where I hit my stride. I look forward to watching my girls become strong, independent Tall People one day.

So yesterday we began the goodbye process by posing for the annual group photo at Belle Croft preschool. The photographer kept suspiciously eyeing my camera as if I was trying to cop a free shot, so I was only able to capture the staging of what seemed like 4,000 hyperactive puppies. The patience and fortitude of the teachers and photographer were award-winning, let me tell you. Can't wait to see the finished product...yes, Allan Ruelle, I will pay for it!

I love the Short People's future school as much as I have loved Belle Croft. Pungoteague Elementary ia very ethnically diverse (unlike Belle Croft, as you can see), very socioeconomically diverse. It's small and homey. Everyone greeted me with a smile, a hand-shake, an introduction. Just what Tracy and I want for our girls. We both attended a relatively poorly-funded school system with a somewhat diverse population. We did not receive a stellar education, but we did walk out of our school system with the immesurably important skill of understanding how to get along with people who are different from ourselves. To us, this gift is greater than any textbook-gained knowledge. We went on to a university (JMU - Go Dukes! ) that provided us all the education we could ask for. We both hold Master's Degrees (or Tracy will in a couple of weeks) and are versed in many subjects, but without that social foundation (and social conscience)we are nothing.

Enough soapbox...suffice it to say that I am not weeping about sending India to kindergarten in the fall. Two years from now when it is Katie's turn...who can say? I might be a crumbling wreck or I may just dance in the streets. I have always worshipped at the altar of Independence, and today was India's first glimpse at the chapel. Hooray for her!

2007-04-24T07:43:00.000-05:00

I'm so tired,

I haven's slept a wink.

I'm so tired,

My mind is on the blink.

--The Beatles "I'm So Tired"

As usual, I'm stretching for sick songs; there are only so many I can think of. I haven't been quite been well in ages, but I was at least functioning until the weekend. I've had another relapse, and let's just say it put a damper on the fun-filled weekend I had predicted in my last post. The weather was gorgeous and the rest of the Turmanators spent Saturday and Sunday working and playing in the yard. I spent Saturday and Sunday (and Monday too) in bed. I did at least open the windows.

Yesterday I met with an ENT to have a culture taken of my sinuses (and wasn't THAT fun!) and discuss surgery. Dr. Saffold came at me with a very large wand and stuck it impossibly far up into my nose and sinuses. He has decided to try another round of anitibiotics before surgery. I've had enough antibiotics in the last year to treat the population of China, but he wants to try more. Okay. I'm not a big fan of surgery, but on the other hand the last time I remember feeling well was last July: at this point I am ready to pack my bags, check in to the hospital and refuse to leave until I am well.

Over the weekend the Short People took a break from digging in the dirt long enough to attend the birthday parties of two friends. I neglected to bring my camera to one, but the second party was the cutest thing ever. Their buddy Ellie hosted a tea party for her 6th birthday, complete with china, silver, fancy straw hats, and white gloves. The Short People loved it! So girlie.

Now we are preparing for Tracy to make his annual mecca to MerleFest...four days of filth, debauchery and bluegrass. I was a little worried about how I would care for the Short People while he was gone, but my mother has graciously volunteered to come to the Shore and help out. The Short People are thrilled to have their Yo-Yo come for a visit, and I am too. Maybe the antibiotics and steroids will kick in enough that we can make a trip to the beach while she is here.

2007-04-20T11:16:00.000-05:00

Noo, no, no, no

I can't take it no more

I'm tired of waking up on the floor.

No, thank you, please,

It only makes me sneeze,

And then it makes it hard to find the door.

-- Ringo Starr "The No No Song"

Another inappropriate, drug-related song selection today brought to you by Triaminic Cough and Cold Thin Strips.

The Short People came home from preschool with colds. Nothing major; low-grade fevers, sniffles, and sore throats. On our way home we stopped at the drugstore and I spotted this innocent looking medication on sale and decided to try it. BIG MISTAKE.

Triaminic Thin Stips are EVIL. Within a half hour my drowsy, peaked Short People were transformed into coked up Tasmanian devils. Kate was running circles around the couch faster than I've ever seen her, shrieking "HI MOMMY!...HI DADDY!...HI INDIA!...HI MOMMY!..." . India was talking so rapidly to her grandparents that it was barely decipherable; "pops

andgigikateiscrackingmeupsheissosillyhahahahaha

ihaveacoldbutifeelbetternowwehadpeanutbutter

sandwichesforlunchhahaha..." She laughed like a hyena between sentences as she watched Kate twirl around the couch. I should have tried to take a picture but I'm not sure that even the sports action option would have captured anything but two blurs.

Now they are feeling better, and today we are taking advantage of the beautiful (finally) weather. Hope your weekend promises to be as gorgeous and fun-filled as ours should be.

By the way, those Thin Strips are in the trash.

2007-04-17T10:25:00.000-05:00

I said leave me alone

I'm singing all night long

it's a family tradition

-- Hank Williams, Jr.

Perhaps not the best choice of songs to use when discussing my children, but I left out the inappropriate lyrics and besides; the Short People can't read yet. There are days I have lyric block and today that Hank line just kept coming back. Nothing else would do.

Here is one of our family traditions. The first photo is me. When my sister Clare was little my parents had her portrait done wearing the same dress and sitting in an inverse pose so when the portaits are hung side by side we face each other. Sorry Clarie, I don't have a photo of you to post since Mom and Dad have yours (although, come to think of it, you hate your hair in that portrait so you are probably glad I didn't share it with the world). My parents saved the dress, and when the Short People were born we decided to replicate the portraits.

Not as easy as it sounds.

It turns out that this style of portraiture (taking a photograph, blowing it up onto canvas and then painting over top of the photo in oils) is a lost art. After much research we located a man in Florida who still does this work. We shipped India's portrait to him, along with mine for comparison, and here is the finished product. I'm a bit biased, but I think it is beautiful. We jsut have to figure out where to hang it and begin saving up to have Kate's done in the fall before she outgrows the dress!

Now is a great time for all you blog stalkers to leave a comment. What's your favorite family tradition?

2007-04-15T07:52:00.000-05:00

What's new pussycat?
Woah, Woah
What's new pussycat?
Woah, Woah
Pussycat, Pussycat
I've got flowers
And lots of hours
To spend with you.
-- Tom Jones "What's New Pussycat?"

Kate: "Mommy, Daddy, I wan' a boat for my birfday."

India: (big sigh) "Katie, we can't buy you a boat...we don't have enough wrapping paper to cover it up."

The Geat Belated Birthday Extravaganza was Saturday, and despite a cake CATastrophe (sorry; couldn't resist) it was great fun. Check out the purple wombat. The only thing that could have made the cake more hideous was a flesh wound, and the cat/wombat received a slashed throat as I removed it from the fridge. Not as visible in the photo, but trust me...almost an R rating for excessive and gratuitous violence. Never was I so sorry for cherry insides!

Both Short People have adored Eric Carle's "Brown Bear" book, and Katie P. particularly loves the purple cat. Thus the inspiration for the party. My apologies to Mr. Carle...the cake is heinous but the compliment remains. I'm planning to write Mr. Carle a little note to thank him for all his books, but expecially this one. When India was in the Children's Hospital for a week at 6 months of age that book soothed her like nothing else. We didn't even need the book itself...I could recite it by heart and calm her instantly. Thank God for Eric Carle's special magic. I promise, I won't scare him by sending him a shot of the wombat.

Desipite the nasty cake we had a great time. We were all to reconvene at the Mason's house for Ellie's 6th birthday party on Sunday, but the weather had other ideas. We've had so much rain from the Nor' Easter that Ellie's parents driveway is impassable. We have enormous flooded spots in the yard but NO LEAKS in the walls, which is a feat, believe me.

Tracy and I passed the unexpected free time by reading the local paper. Janice, look what was published just for our amusement; another "Giz" installment! Tracy, myself, my friend Janice, and perhaps three quarters of the residents of the Easern Shore enjoy the twice-yearly poems for "Giz". Do you think his spouse understands slang?

2007-04-13T19:30:00.000-05:00

One of these days

I'm going to sit down and write a long letter

To all the good friend I've known

One of these days

One of these days And it won't be long...

-- Neil Young "One of these Days"

Oh, it's so good to be semi-back to normal. Tonight I was able to resume our Friday Night Happy Hour, which basically consists of a few friends meeting after school on Friday. A "Designated Daddy "is assigned to bring take-out dinner on his way home and we meet and eat (maybe a few drinks) until bedtime. A wonderful way to wind down a week and a tradition I have sorely missed while ill. I've also missed out on several other events, including our second annual March Mommy Madness weekend in Norfolk. I have pined for all my good friends, and am reminded how grateful I am for our friendships,as well that of our children. We are so lucky here; raising our children in some ways in a 50s/60s style of protective familiarity and comfort that is hard to find elsewhere in the States.

I LOVE IT.

Today we met at "Big Kate's" in Harborton (not t obe confused with our Kate), a bayside town that Tracy and I have been in love with since we moved to the Shore. B.S.P. (Before Short People) we used to crab off the dock in Harborton. Today's outdoor photos are taken off that dock, including the inscription on the end of the dock which reads "God Bless the boys who make the noise off the South side of Pungoteague Creek".

So classic Eastern Shore. All the little "fingers" of waterways around the bayside are called "creeks" which is what you see in the photos...Pungoteague Creek. This is a Native American word (and settlement) that dates back to before the 17th century. The history here is amazing; just come see what we pull out of our yard!

As I snapped photos sea turtles paddled and laughing gulls called to me. What a cool spot; one of the many little gems I adore here on Virginia's Eastern Shore. Summer is coming and somtimes I think that is all the medicine I need. Happy weekend!

2007-04-12T07:08:00.000-05:00

Lips like sugar

Sugar kisses

She knows what she knows

I know what she`s thinking

-- Echo and the Bunnymen "Lips Like Sugar"

I know what she's thinking, too. She's thinking "give me some of that Easter Candy!"

Is everyone else hoarding about 57 pounds of chocolate, jelly beans, and various other temptations? I'm beginning to suspect that the Easter basket is a tradition perpetrated by the American Dental Association. As luck (good or bad luck, I'm not sure) would have it, the Short People prefer the really, really sugary stuff to chocolate. And guess who loves chocolate more than anything? That would be me; the one who has gained 40 pounds in the last 6 months thanks to my Magical Mystery Illness. I'm trying to step away from the chocolate bunnies but they keep calling my name...

We had a great time celebrating Easter weekend in Southwest Virginia. The Short People had a fabulous time with their cousins, going for walks in the woods, riding Pop's four wheeler and strewing toys from one end of the Turman's house to the other. We also visited my grandmother and my grandfather in their respective nursing facilities, and hosted a baby shower for my cousin Rob and his wife Ashley. It was wonderful to see so many family members and enjoy a little mountain air.

2007-04-10T10:24:00.000-05:00

trail of broken hearts

looking back at you

now and from the start

these words will travel true

the godspeed of trust

will settle the dust

we've been passing through

-- K.D. Lang "Trail of Broken Hearts"

We said goodbye to Millie yesterday. As we were packing to leave last Wednesday she became very ill and remained in the vet hospital during our trip out of town. We discovered she was in the beginning stages of renal failure but our vet fully expected her to come back home when we returned. We hated to leave her, but we checked in every day. Unfortunately she took a turn for the worse and had to be put down yesterday just before we got back on the Shore.

Millie was always Tracy's dog. My presence was tolerated, but I think she often cursed under her breath about the Short People. She had been with us six or seven years before India was born and was used to having Tracy all to herself . But she never growled or snapped, just merely rolled her eyes and moved to another, quieter room where there were no children and she could nap in peace.

Millie was amazingly smart. She was obsessed with tennis balls (we called her our "tennis ball retriever"). Once we hid one in a coffee table drawer so she would stop pelting us with it...she immediately crawled under the table, opened the drawer with her nose, and snatched the ball from the drawer like she had been opening things all her life.

Daisy Jane, her "sister", is lost without Millie. She keeps running in and out of the house, looking around and occasionally sniffing Millie's bowl. She's confused, poor girl. It breaks my heart. The Short People are upset, but waited about 6.5 minutes before they asked "does this mean we can get a puppy?". Ah, the protective innocence of children!

Goodbye Millie. We miss you.

2007-04-03T18:01:00.000-05:00

Almost cut my hair

It happened just the other day

It's gettin kinda long

I coulda said it wasn't in my way

But I didn't and I wonder why

I feel like letting my freak flag fly

-- Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young "Almost Cut My Hair"

Kate came running from the bathroom shouting "I found some hair!". Not a phrase one hears often, so I quit cooking dinner and investigated. This is what she handed me.

At first I thought it was mine. I have enough that I wouldn't notice losing that amount and I panicked, thinking it was perhaps some odd side effect of my illness or medication. After I realized it was too short to belong to me my heart rate resumed a nice, slow pace and knew it could only be be India's.

I asked her about it, and India claimed it just "flew" out. Yeah.

When I presented the mass of hair to Tracy he immediately questioned whether I had seen India's scissors. Of course! Being a therapist I am practiced at asking kids open-ended questions, so instead of asking "Did you cut your hair?" I calmly...sort-of...asked her "So, how much hair did you cut?"

"Not much", she said, bursting into tears.

I had to go upstairs so she wouldn't catch me cracking up.

2007-04-02T11:26:00.000-05:00

Tangerine,
Tangerine,
Living reflection from a dream;
I was her love, she was my queen...
--Led Zepplin "Tangerine"

Meet Tangerine. She's the little white fluffy thing stuffed Paris Hylton-style inside a purse.

Surprised that she isn't orange? Me too. I'm not even sure where Kate heard the term "tangerine" but I can tell by the way she lets it roll off her tongue that she loves the sound of the word and has no clue of it's meaning.

Aunt Katie sent her $10 for her birthday and Kate informed me "I wanna get a little monkey with my birthday money". We took a trip to The Book Bin; one of our favorite spots on the Shore (the playhouse and toys for them, the coffee and book browsing for me). We walked in scouting for monkeys, but Kate saw tangerine from across the room, their eyes met and it was love at first sight.

She ran to Tangerine, snatched her off the hanging display, yelled "I want dis puppy!", ripped the price tag off and threw it to the floor. No one has ever accused Kate of not knowing what she wants. I picked it up and, as fate would have it, it was exactly $10. This photo is the Short People before their last day of preschool before Spring Break. They insisted on wearing bunny ears for their Easter party. Kate also wore them into the hospital one day when I had to get some blood drawn. She wanted me to wear India's but I demurred. We're off on Wednesday to SW Virginia for Easter, so I don't get another post in before then hope everyone's holiday is happy.

2007-03-28T13:13:00.000-05:00

If I had ever been here before I would probably know just what to do.

Don't you?

If I had ever been here before on another time around the wheel

I would probably know just how to deal

With all of you.

And I feel

Like I've been here before...

-- Crosby Stills Nash and Young "Deja Vu"

Do you ever feel like raising children is just one big scene from "Groundhog Day"? I have the same conversations with the Short People EVERY FREAKIN' DAY. To illustrate, a typical trip in the car goes a little somethin' like this:

ME: "Okay, everybody hop in. No India, that's Katie's side. Wrong side, India. This is your seat. Hop in. Hop in. Hop in!"

SP: (Lots of standing there staring at the car doors with blank expressions, running far into the yard, picking dandilions.)

ME: "Let's sit in our seats. Sit down. Sit down. SIT!! Kate. sit. on. your. bottom. (said through clenched teeth)"

SP: (standing up in car seats or milling around in the floorboard) "What's this thing in the floor, Momma?" "Can we have a Tic Tac?" "I want to hear 'Willin'!" "No, I wanna hear that sad song!" "Where are we going?"

ME: "EVERYBODY please sit in your seats. No, you can't have a Tic Tac. We are listening to the radio. We're going to playgroup...school...the grocery store...."

SP: "I can't hear the radio" then "unitelligible gibberish" only audible to dogs.

ME: turning down the radio "I can't hear you. Can you speak up please?"

SP: "unitelligible gibberish" only slightly louder this time.

ME: turning the radio off "I. can't. hear. you."

SP: "Can we have another Tic Tac?"

ME: "I'm driving, girls. I can't hand anything back to you."

SP: "I can't hear the radio!"

ME: turning the radio back up "can you ask nicely? Thanks."

SP: "unintelligible gibberish"

ME: "If you keep talking to me when the radio is on I can't hear you. Do you still want the radio?"

SP: "Yes!" then "MOMMY!!!!! I need unintelligible gibberish"

Where is the learning curve? Why must we do this EVERY DAY? Do they ever learn to get into the car and their seats without seven or eight prompts? Will they ever even figure out which car seat is theirs? Do they ever realize that I cannot hear them over the radio? They are plenty loud at home; why do they speak in a whisper in the car?

It's a good thing they are cute. And they have been extra cute this week. I think they are relieved to have their Mommy back. These are some of the bon mot from the last few days.

Kate: "There's the stool (school) that's full of pimientos (this one took me a while, but I realized she meant asbestos)"

India: "Momma, I broke my elbow during the war of 1812 and I died" (? I have no idea...don't ask)

Kate: "I had a little mad on my face when they wouldn't give me a turn in the wagon"

India: I know what that sound is; he's playing a hormonimonica"

2007-03-25T15:40:00.000-05:00

Diamond girl,

You sure do shine.

Glad I found you,

Glad you're mine.

-- Seals and Crofts "Diamond Girl"

On March 12 Kitty Cat Kate turned 3! She is a constant source of amusement, consternation, affection, energy, frustration and ethusiasm in this house and we celebrated her birthday with all the pomp and circumstance we could muster.

Which wasn't much.

I've not been posting, as many of you are aware, because I've been incredibly SICK for about 3 months. Sometimes things got a little better, sometimes a little worse. Since the last post things truly tanked, worrying us that I was heading for the hospital. By the time of Kate's birthday I was barely functioning. We canceled our plans to go to the restaurant of her choice and even postponed her birthday party. Tracy's parents came up to help with the Short People and brought a new tricycle, which seemed to lessen the blows, but I have felt incredibly guilty. Hopefully she won't remember, but I will.

We have just returned from Charlottesville and a second visit with the immunologist. He thinks I have something called Selective Antibody Deficiency with Normal Immunoglobulins (SADNI). It's pretty rare; rare enough that my other doctor said "Huh?"...he's never heard of this. We are running more bood tests for confirmation, and if this is what I have it may mean gamma globulin injections to help maintain some semblance of an immune system. Through all this I have gained a ton of weight, which may or may not resolve itself with treatment. For this reason I was referred to an endocrinologist who wants me to try a new med that should be FDA approved in a few months. Don't know if I will be up for that or not; we'll see.

In the meantime I am taking whopping amounts of an antibiotic of last resort that eradicates all bacteria in your body, including the good kinds. I have to eat 2 containers of organic yogurt a day and monitor my digestive system like a hawk or I could develop some pretty nasty diseases from the treatment. I loathe taking medicine and just realized I take more pills than my 90 year old grandmother. The antibiotic is working, though, and today I finally feel like I might climb out of this hole and feel better.

Needless to say, things here have been difficult, at best. I will say that it is nice to have a tentative diagnosis after almost 15 years of dealing with this off and on. And it is also nice to know that the DR doesn't think I have Wegner's Granulotosis, which is what one DR thought I had and can be fatal. The Short People and Tracy have been incredibly patient and our friends and family have been amazingly kind. Thank you to all those readers (I never knew how many of you out there read without commenting...I'd love to hear from you here!) who called or wrote. I also had many friends bring delicious healthy meals to help us through and so many friends who helped with the Short People in lots of ways both big and small. Thank you, thank you! And Kate, I will make it up to you...

2007-03-09T12:38:00.000-05:00

Snow

It won't be long before we'll all be there with snow

Snow

I want to wash my hands, my face and hair with snow

Snow

I long to clear a path and lift a spade of snow

Snow

Oh, to see a great big man entirely made of snow

-- Irving Berlin "Snow"

Wasn't I just writing about spring weather? No, it didn't snow that much this week. The above photo is from Christmas 2004, right before Kate was born, and is a bit of a blur for me. If we didn't have the snapshot to prove it, I'm not sure I'd remember that it happened. India was 18 months old, I was 7 months pregnant, and very sick with bronchitis.

This recent snowfall was not nearly so dramatic. Lots of flakes but just a dusting on the ground. The flurries fell off and on for 2 days and was very exciting to the Short People, who just can't understand why folks in books and on TV are able to sled and build snowmen but they cannot. Even if it did snow enough here, it is flat as a pancake so sledding is not really possible. Snowmen...I suppose it happens now and then. Shells for eyes, I think?

The Short People love to hear Tracy and I tell them about sledding where we grew up. My neighborhood had fabulous sledding parties with bonfires, roasted marshmallows, and thermoses of hot chocolate. My senior year of high school our county received so much snow that we missed almost a month of school. My best friend and I had several sledding parties (Mike, if you are reading...remember those?). One of my neighbors and I used to build ramps and dare each other to ride down, and I have great memories of using a tractor tire inner tube to load six or seven people "pyramid" style and go down that way. We did most of our sledding in a field with horses, and it's a miracle that neither people nor animals were injured in these adventures. They were some of the best times from my childhood, and lack of snow and sledding is one of the saddest things about living on the Eastern Shore. I suppose we'll have to visit Tracy's brother in Abingdon (Hi, Brian!) so the girls can experience the excitement of playing in the snow.

If the other Turman girls are reading, then HAPPY BIRTHDAY GILLIAN!!!!! We love you and hope to visit soon.

2007-03-05T09:20:00.000-05:00

Ha sido un invierno eterno

Y loco me vuelve la nieve

Primavera venga ya

Venga la primavera venga ya venga

Primavera...

-- Dan Zanes "Queremos Bailar"

Roughly translated the lyrics are "it's been an eternal winter and the snow is making me crazy. Come spring, come...". At least I think that's what it says. All you Spanish speakers correct me if I've misinterpreted. By the way, Dan Zanes used to be with the Del Fuegos (remember them, my fellow children of the 80s?) and now does fabulous family music that is never hokey or annoying. Check him out at http://www.danzanes.com/pages/home.php. If nothing else, you'll love his hair.

If my translation is accurate then"Queremos Bailar" sums up the mood here. All the Turmanators are enjoying warmer weather, longer days, and that little something extra in the air that tells us spring is on it's way. Friday was so warm we spent the whole day outside. If you look closely at Kate you'll see her "white" shirt and pants are incredibly filthy with mud and sidewalk chalk. India spent most of the day carrying a stick in her mouth pretending to be a dog (our dogs gave her some odd looks as barked and panted, following them around the yard). We even went exploring through the field and into the woods where we all got sratched by briars and I found an old dump site full of intact bottles...really cool and I carried them home in my shirt so I was filthy, too. Tracy got home from work at a normal time for a change and we grilled and had a fire on the patio. It was wonderful; a taste of things to come.

Saturday was not as warm when our friends John and Susan and their daughters Ellie and Anne came for dinner. They brought a bucket of the Shore's famous Tammy's and Johnny's fried chicken (oh, unspeakably good!) and we planned to eat outside but a cold wind chased us indoors where the gruesome foursome wrecked the Short People's bedroom and wore every dress up item they could fit on their bodies. It won't be long, though, before that wind will keep us from wilting in the heat so I won't complain.

This morning Kate refuses to eat her vitamin:

Kate - "it too spicy" (huge grimace)

India -" Don't you want to be healthy, Katie?"

Kate - "NOPE!"

2007-02-28T18:59:00.000-05:00

Take your tiny feet out
Of your mother's shoes or
There is going to be a
Terrible scene.
--Elvis Costello " You Tripped at Every Step"

As much as I try to balance the "girlie" side of things, the Short People are hell bent on becoming princess/cheerleader/cosmeticians. Dressing up in "fancies" as Kate calls them, is a near constant activity in our house. I often have to kick them out of my closet, where they enjoy parading in my shoes (it's not like I'm sporting sexy kitten heels; I'm most often barefooted or in Birkenstocks or Tevas).

To illustrate their proclivity for girliness; during the Superbowl I tried to educate them about football. I'm not the least interested in sports, sad to say, but want to give them a chance in case they like sports. India listened very carefully to my informative and educational speech about the game, but sadly retained only the pre-show Cirque de Soliel cheerleading exhibition. She ran upstairs to don cowboy boots, a skort, and JMU homecoming pom poms. I hid my shudder and nodded and smiled. Sometimes you just have to go with it.

Even more disturbing than the cheerleader trend (yes, I know, those of you who knew me in high school don't remind me I was a cheerleader) is the fact that Kate's dress-up proclivities often include nudity. It might be a top or a bottom, but something is likely to be exposed. This worries us more than India's cheerleading inclinations. Maybe she'll outgrow it. She also likes a lot of "bling". Tacky, but her own style, so I enjoy it. She'll learn to conform soon enough.

Two recent funny quotes:

1} When Kate saw the last post she stated "I'm good at shakin' my bootie"...long pause..."Mommy, what's a bootie?". I cracked up, but India solemnly replied "It's a bottom, Katie".

2} This morning I had to reprimand India several times for pushing the boundaries. She sorrowfully informed me, "Mommy, I am sooo sorry. I PROMISE I won't do ANYTHING you tell me to do ALL DAY".

2007-02-25T17:32:00.000-05:00

See that girl, barefootin along,
Whistlin and singin, she's a carryin on.
There's laughing in her eyes, dancing in her feet,
Shes a neon-light diamond and she can live on the street.
Hey hey, hey, come right away
Come and join the party every day.
-- The Grateful Dead "The Golden Road"

Saturday was a day of cleaning, grocery shopping, errand running and a bit of resting, so today was all about play. Finally feeling a little more energetic, the Short People and I threw ourselves into a musical cooking frenzy this morning. The girls selected the Grateful Dead and blueberry pancakes, and I was happy to oblige. The selected quote is the song to which they were shakin' their groove thangs; the lyrics just seemed to fit so well. I love Kate's bootie slap, although I hope she forgets that move by the time she's 10 .

Later I made a homemade mushroom and four cheese lasagna that is warming up as I type...I can almost hear the theme from The Godfather wafting from the kitchen . I've missed cooking, and I've also missed eating something other than take out or grilled beef products (Tracy's two areas of culinary expertise). He's really hung in there and held us all together, but it's nice to be back amongst the living and contributing to our daily functioning (or disfunctioning, as the case may be). The Short People have suffered the most from my illness, so we wanted to devote much of the day to them. We played "Insect Bingo" (where else can you shout out phrases like "spittle bug", "exoskeleton", or "dung beetle"), Simon Says, and completed several jigsaw puzzles. We listened to a lot of music and they played in the tub. It's been fun. Those who know me well understand that though I am not a churchgoer, I find my spiritual center in the outdoors, friends, food, music and family. It's been a great Sunday.

2007-02-17T18:18:00.000-05:00

Dear one, I had enough
Killjoy lurking in the shadows
I been sick and tired

Playing out my day in a dream
-- The Jayhawks "Dying on the Vine"

I've had that "sick and tired" line running through my head a thousand times in the last few weeks. Good thing because, as I've said before (many times) I'm running out of "sick" quotes. I debated even writing about all this, but I've received so many e-mails wondering where the hell I am that I thought I should go ahead and tell you where the hell I've been. Today's photo represents where I'd rather be...it's a San Diego sunset.

I'm feeling a lot like John Lennon lately, hanging out in the bed (though without the paparazzi or Yoko Ono, thank god). You guessed it, I've been sick AGAIN. Evidently my lungs must be a cool place to be, because bronchitis is digging my scene. I've had more steroids than a pro baseball player and I smoke the hookah (okay, it's a nebulizer, but I can pretend) every 4 hours faithfully. I've taken enough antibiotics that I should be able to touch bacteria on the kitchen counter and hear it sizzle but IT JUST WON'T GO AWAY. I was sick enough that the Short People had to travel across State to stay with my in-laws for a week...what a guilt trip I've had over that. My doctor is mystified and I am heading to UVA on Wednesday next week to see an immunologist. Maybe someone can figure out what is wrong with me before Tracy decides to put me down in the backyard like Old Yeller.

At the same time all this has been going on, Kate developed an infected lymph gland. I am talkin' bout a one inch long by 3/4 of an inch wide, swollen, bulging, goiteresque (put that word in for you, Clariee) lymph gland. The kind of lymph gland that makes your pediatrician mutter "oh, MY" under her breath as she breaks out the tape measure to determine it's size. In addition I can safely say that, like her father, Kate is allergic to meds in the penicillin family. I am certain because I am looking at my sweet baby covered (and I do mean covered) with red, swollen, hot hives. These beauties popped out a few days into her antibiotic treatment for the lymph gland. We are coasting through the weekend until the hives calm down, then trying a new and hopefully less offensive antibiotic for her. Maybe we can trade meds?

WE ARE A HOUSE OF HORRORS.

I'm writing this as I warm up oh so nutritious chicken nuggets for my children and send Tracy off with some of our friends to see the blue grass band we were supposed to see together. Feeling a bit sorry for myself and splurging on a glass (or two) of wine. Who cares; the antibiotics aren't working anyway!

Sorry for the long absence, and I'm sure I'll have lots of photos to post in the days ahead. None of them will involve hives, antibiotics or breathing treatments.

2007-01-19T17:44:00.000-05:00

Smell the warm and salty air

See a wave reflect a beam
Stop and find a pretty shell for her
Make it real your summer dream
-- The Beach Boys "Your Summer Dream"

I've been out of commission with Strep throat for a week, but not before having a wonderful weekend in Corolla, NC. Amazing, amazing weather; so warm and beautiful, and a fantastic time with good friends. We stayed in the sun every possible minute. It's ironic to be loading these picures as I watch the snow melt outside...what a difference!

The Short People had a ball too, as you can see from the photos. They played outside until they dropped; on Saturday an eerie silence sent us downstairs to check on them all six children were in their beds putting themsleves down for a nap!

Since our Corolla weekend I've been pretty ill; the seventh time since May. I just returned from some lab testing at the hospital...still on the hunt for what is going on with me. Hopefully we'll find something soon. 'Til then, the beach is good medicine.

2007-01-10T13:58:00.000-05:00

And there's no difference
Between the Earth and the sky
There's no reason
We have to die
--"Evergreen" Matthew Sweet

"AND YOU WILL ALWAYS LOVE US,
AND YOU WILL ALWAYS BE OUR MOMMY,
EVEN AFTER YOU ARE DEAD "
-- India Turman

This is a common refrain in our household. The Short People and I will be playing a rousing game of Candyland, driving in the car, or eating lunch and India will launch into this now-familiar statement. She's said it so often that Kate will join her and they chant in unison. There's always that special emphasis on the word "dead".

It all started with "The Lion King". India was curious and asked lots of questions about Mufasa "gettin' deaded"; then last spring after my grandmother passed away India had many more questions. At one point she even asked me if Granny fell off a cliff just like Mufasa (talk about comic relief)! She's a bit obsessed with the subject; can't decide which I dislike more...incessant talk about "The Little Mermaid" or incessant talk about death.

The other day India wanted to know where your body goes when you die. I explained about graves and cemeteries, and she insisted that we drive past one so we did. I really believe in answering kids' questions in a limited, simple, but honest way so I try to be truthful in discussing difficult topics. So we talked about cemeteries as a place to honor our loved ones and the comfort that brings to the rest of us. I opted to avoid discussing cremation and explaining that is what her Daddy and I have chosen...especially since a recent fire safety segment at school scared the begeezus out of her!

I strongly believe that our culture inappropriately shields children from death. No longer do we see farm animals die so we may eat, no more do we hold wakes in our home; death is sanitized to the point that we just don't talk about it. Now people like me are hired to enter schools and counsel children on how to deal with something that was just a part of life 50 years ago. With that said, however, I feel there is a happy medium of what is appropriate for a 4 and 2 year old and walking that line can be difficult at times. India and Kate are not upset by the subject, just curious. And I'm okay with that...to a point. India's death refrain always stops me cold. I hide my tears, hug them close, and tell them "That is exactly right, my loves. Exactly right."

2007-01-09T08:17:00.000-05:00

We spotted the ocean

At the head of the trail

Where are we goin'

So far away

And somebody told me

That this is the place

Where everything's better

And everything's safe

--"Walk On The Ocean"

Toad the Wet Sprocket

All this gobal warming has produced some wonderful spring-like days on the Eastern Shore. My body has been tricked into thinking summer is coming, and I'm trying to soak up every minute before reality hits hard. We've felt incredibly close to nature the last few days thanks to gorgeous weather and the gift of two rare visitors.

The first was a bald eagle, who graced us by standing in our backyard about 50 yards away... until I decided to make a break for the camera and he flew off. Sorry guys, I would love to have a photo of him but I chased him away!

I did snag photos of our next visitor. This jellyfish was undulating along Cape Charles Beach Sunday when we went for a stroll. The Bay is full of "nettles" (tiny, opaque jellyfish) in the summer, but to see a large, live, colorful jellyfish in action in the Bay in JANUARY is something I've never witnessed. The Bay is unusually warm for this time of year and I think a lot of strange things are happening in there. This big beauty was fascinating as she undulated and waved her tentacles. The photos just don't do it justice. Just glad it was too cold for swimming!

All of our outdoor adventures took place between doses of Ibuprophen for India. She fought high fevers all weekend (103.8 at it 's highest) but would recover with meds and start playing soccer or running down the beach until we made her stop. After 5 days of high fever I took her to our pediatrician and she has strep...never once complaining of a sore throat! Now I am thowing out toothbrushes and Lysoling anything that doesn't move in the hopes that Kate won't come down with strep too. We are planning to head to the Outer Banks with a big group of friends for the weekend and I need to go...that way I can keep fooling myself that Spring has Sprung.

Kate Starts Preschool

2007-01-06T19:00:00.000-05:00

I can see you in the morning
When you go to school
Don't forget your books
You know you've got to learn the golden rule. --Supertramp "School"

Kate managed to simultaneously break my heart and thrill me to my marrow all in the same day as she started preschool on Thursday. Having two days a week to grocery shop, clean, paint (an impending "This Old Turman House" project) and, perhaps most significantly, actually go the restroom or shower without Short People commmentary is heady stuff. And the fact that Kate seems to already LOVE it makes the whole plan so much more palatable! Now I'm just left with the "what kind of stay-at-home- mom are you" guilt that goes along with unnecessary preschool enrollment, and I'm dealing with that with a few glasses of wine and lots of support from my friends who assure me I'm not going to Hell for enrolling Kate at Belle Croft with her sister.

But Kate is THRILLED! I was dismissed Thursday, her first day, with a smiley "Bye, Mommy!" and greeted in the afternoon with a tour of all her favorite spots. She also managed to keep her underwear dry the whole day, which for me is almost more exciting than anything else. I will not shed a tear when I say goodbye to diapers, that's for sure. What a grown-up girl Katie is. I can't believe that I have one child old enough for Kindergarten next year and another who is wearing underwear and attending preschool. Time flies...

2007-01-03T13:20:00.000-05:00

I'm down to my last cigarette

Gonna smoke it down, and try to forget

I know i could make it through the night

If i could only get a light

-- Blues Traveler "Can't Get a Light"

Smoke 'em if you got 'em, baby! This was one of my stocking stuffers from Santa, aka my parents. I know, sick kind of gift, but these are the same people who gave me a mannequin for Christmas in 2001 and have also given me a real coffin for our annual Halloween party. I was telling my parents about a nebulous childhood memory involving a vending machine that sold toys, from which we purchased a small smoking monkey. Dad remembered the incident and couldn't track down the monkey, but did find this smokin' number. The girls love it, and ask questions like "Is the baby finished it's cigarette yet?" or "can we make him smoke again?". Probably not the best role-modeling for the Short People. I should have a talk with them about the evils of tobacco.

All right, this is for Clare...what do we name him? Everybody please send a suggestion. This baby needs a moniker, especially for when he enters rehab. How can you participate in group therapy if you don't have a name?

2007-01-01T19:37:00.000-05:00

Should auld acquaintance be forgot
and never brought to mind?

Should auld acquaintance be forgot
and days of auld lang syne?

For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,

we'll take a cup of kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

Auld Lang Syne--attributed to Robert Burns

We celebrated the New Year with gusto, kicking things off with an impromptu party. What began as a chance for my friend Debbie to escape from being a housebound new mother and giving her other two children an outlet to play quickly transformed into 7 children, 6 adults, a bonfire, a Pizza Hut run and a bottle of wine. Tracy called to inform me that he ran into Debbie's husband Brad coming out of surgery (he's the physician, not the patient) and was bringing him by for a drink. At the same time, our friends John and Susan pulled up, children in tow, to borrow our bathroom (they were returning from a trip across the bay and didn't think they could make it the 20 miles to their house). They stayed too, it was a great time, and a perfect way to start off a holiday weekend. This is perhaps my favorite thing about small town living...where else could that kind of party serendipity happen?

Saturday was also a day of celebration. First for Tracy and I, because we purged the house of literally BAGS of toys for donation that the girls have outgrown. Most of the remaining toys are now ensconsed in THEIR room upstairs, so we can actually see the floor in the den for the first time in 4.5 years. Saturday was also a celebration for Kate because she moved into a big girl bed. She scoffed at our offer of a bed rail, stating "I a big dirl (girl) an' I don' need dat". She slept through the night without incident and is so proud of this as well as her almost exclusive move to "un'wear". She's so cute, walking around muttering under her breath about "hewwo kitty un'wear", "big dirl bed", and "I so gwown-up".

Sunday we started the great Christmas Decoration Purge. I always dread this, and there is still so much to do. It's a depressing process. I am very much a sunshine and outdoors kinda girl, and the end of the Holidays signals the beginning of a vast stretch of endless dreary days. I feel like hibernating (translation: eating and sleeping) until spring. This is always a hard time of year for me, but particularly so now that we have children because where we live is so isolated that there is not much entertainment. Winter days can seem endless on the Shore. Thank god for craft supplies or I wouldn't survive 'til spring!

Sunday night we went to our friends John and Susan's for a New Year's dinner party. Pretty cool to sit on their back porch and listen to the ocean bring in the New Year. We were home at 2 and the girls were up at 6:30 so you can bet that we are pretty tired and a litte hung over today! Hope all of you are feeling better than I am and are having a great start to 2007.

2006-12-28T15:48:00.000-05:00

It's all over, there isn't any more.
It's all over, but what's it over for?
Just when you think the party's started...
It's over, it's over, it's over.
--Squirrel Nut Zippers "It's Over"

What a whirlwind! The holidays were full of sugarplums and cookies, decorating and wrapping, shopping and parades, and Nutcracker, Nutcracker, Nutcracker. The Turmanators were incredibly busy, as you may have noticed by the dearth of blogging during December. Today's photos include the girls decorating cookies, posing for our Christmas card, playing with presents, India backstage at the Nutcracker with her friends, and Kate posing with a sooty kiss from Santa on her cheek.

This was the first year that both of the Short People really understood the magic of Christmas. There was much anticipation, first for our visit from Pops and Gigi (Tracy's parents) the weekend before Christmas, and then for traveling to Richmond to have Christmas with my family. The girls were thrilled to stay at Daden and Yoyo's house...once they were assured that they do have a fireplace and Santa will know how to find them. It was wonderful to have Clare and Derek there; they alternate between families and this year was ours.

As with most children, the excitement of Christmas was often accompanied by unadulterated mania. We found ourselves resorting to humming the refrain of "you better watch out, you better not cry..." more than once, ashamed to admit.
I also must admit that my recent lapse in blogging is also the reason for our trip to Richmond for the Holidays. My father has been diagnosed with both an ulcer and, much more seriously, an aortic aneurysm. Riding in the car for long periods is too painful so we decided to travel to him instead. He was scheduled to have surgery this week but it has been postponed for a month or two. I suppose I just didn't feel like writing about all holiday activities without mentioning what was on my mind the most. A recent follow-up has shown no growth in the aneurysm so I am feeling better about things. My father's health concerns have certainly been a reminder of how important it is to enjoy every minute of life and family. And isn't that also what the Holidays are all about?

25 days and Counting!

2006-12-01T11:42:00.000-05:00

The snow is falling down
Up in some northern town
But a Carolina Christmas
Is still the best around
Wrap up your teddy bear
Hang your stockings up with care
It's a Carolina Christmas
Were chillin in our underwear
--"Carolina Christmas" the Squirrel Nut Zippers

Not quite in our underwear, really, just shorts, although I hear cooler temperatures are coming with some rain today. The 70+ degree weather is not dampering our holiday spirits, however. Decorations are out...not acutally UP, but out. Until our halls are decked the Short People are contenting themselves with CVS's singing and dancing santa with penguins. We've been so often that I'm concerned the employees may think I'm casing the store, but the girls dance right along and beg to hear them sing again and again. Thank god they don't know that monstrosity is for sale!We also kicked off the holiday season today by decorating a gingerbread house. I think this will be a new tradition for the Turmanators. This year I just used a kit since I barely have time to use the restroom and brush my teeth now, but maybe one year I will do the whole thing from scratch. The girls loved sampling the candies and helping set everything in place with glue made from SUGAR (they were truly amazed by this). Tonight we begin counting down the days 'til Christmas with our advent calendar. Also the ABC family network begins it's marathon of Christmas movies tonight, so those with children or who are young at heart...check it out.

2006-11-29T10:03:00.001-05:00

ha sido un invierno eterno
y loco me vuelve la nieve
primavera venga ya venga la
primavera venga ya venga
primavera
"Queremos Bailar" - Dan Zanes

Hola, mis amigos y amigas! Welcome to the Short People's "Mundo del Espanol". Like most preschoolers, India has always enjoyed dabbling in Spanish (the influence of "Dora" seems to know no bounds). But lately her interest is, shall we say, excesivo? Any counting to be done? Do it in Spanish. Want to say "hello", "goodbye", "thank you" or "your welcome"? All the Turmanators must answer with the appropriate Spanish phrase. Don't know how to say something in Spanish? No problem; India just makes it up! She's enjoying herself and we are having a great time trying not to let her catch us cracking up.

Recently she asked to eat at a Mexican restaurant despite the fact that she does not care for the food. When I questioned whether she really wanted to dine there she haughtily retorted "I ASSUME they will have little cheeseburgers".

But my favorite thus far: when India asked Tracy if she could watch a movie in the car and he responded "I doubt it", India questioned "Is 'I doubt it' Spanish for 'I don't think so'?

Today's photo is of our new patio and firepit (just for you, Brian, Janice and Clare). Tracy's birthday (his first 39th, he says) was this weekend. We did a lot of celebrating; his favorite homemade spareribs, dinner out with friends, etcetera, but our best celebrating was done right here. We spent much of the weekend roasting marshmallows, having a glass of wine and stargazing. Perfecto!